Natasha Chughtai

Steve-O!

2011-12-14T15:09:00.000-08:00

What fun! Steve-O from Jackass came on the show today. Jeff and I had a blast interviewing him and I even got him to show us his back tattoo. This job may be crazy and stressful at times but nobody can deny how fun it can be :)

Birthday Time!

2011-12-04T15:46:00.000-08:00

Sometimes it's the simplest of moments that is defining.

For me last night for my birthday dinner sitting at the table surrounded by the people
who love me most it came to me.

After months of confusion, uncertainty and a deep nagging feeling that perhaps I had made the wrong move leaving the comfort of Eugene, it all came to me that this was it.

Being able to spend a birthday close to home and be with the people who I love the most I suddenly knew that my decision was the right one. Sure I had many wonderful birthdays in Eugene and I will always cherish those memories ...but what was missing was family and now I have it.

Once the thought came to me it was easy to know what to wish for when blowing out my birthday candles...and that is exactly what I did..

Comfort

2011-11-30T15:30:00.000-08:00

Working at Channel 7 feels more comfortable everyday. Today I planned a wonderful surprise lunch for our morning show producer Ellen. It was so nice to have several people from the station show up and wish her a great birthday. Things have changed so much in the last few months. I went from complete stress and sadness from leaving Eugene to finally starting to settle down and make friends here. It's a very good feeling. Tomorrow after the show I am going to head down to the Twin Cities to spend my birthday with my family. We are having a little get together at my house with some of my closest friends. It doesn't get much better than that. Now I have a job I love and am close to my family. I still miss Eugene a lot but things are starting to look a lot more hopeful :)

Happy Change

2011-11-28T15:42:00.000-08:00

It's been a very long time since I have posted but I wanted to give everyone a quick update. I am finally settling here in the Cedar Valley and starting to feel more comfortable by the day. It's been a hectic few months with many emotions and changes in life. Though I miss Eugene daily, at the end of the day I know that I made the right decision for me both personally and professionally. I am proud of myself for taking this big step --one that feels like it will lead me to many new adventures in my life. I have faith this step will bring me something very exciting not just professionally. I plan to keep you all posted.

Looking Forward

2011-10-15T22:45:00.001-07:00

It's late and I cannot sleep. Seems as though my schedule is still on Eugene time and I cannot bring myself to fall asleep even though my entire family is in dreamland. Next week I start my job! I cannot wait! It was very nice to have two and a half weeks to relax and spend with my family before starting work but now I am beyond ready to start my new adventure. My first day on air at KWWL will be October 24th which is just over a week away. This is a interesting time in my life. I am very excited to start at a fresh station with endless possibilities but I still miss Eugene and my old friends.

It's funny how I am not going to go back though it feels as though I am just on a vacation with my family and will hop a plane back to Oregon at the end of it. The last few weeks have been such a whirlwind and I must say I am proud of myself for being as strong as I have while saying goodbye to a place that I Loved with friends who I deeply cherish and care about.

Eugene was amazing and I will always hold a special place for it in my heart but I knew that it was time for me to go. I had advanced all I could at the station and had fallen in a very predictable pattern that had continued for too long. Comfort can be a very good thing but when you stay in it for too long you cease to grow. Despite amazing viewers, several people who cared for me greatly and dear, dear friends--I made a choice for me. I made the choice to go.

NO it was not easy. I had several moments of regret and many nights laying awake wondering if I had made the right decision. I think deep down I have come to terms with this--that you never quite know if it's the right decision but you must take the risk and the chance. I needed to do this for me or I would always wonder "what if"

Several people have told me they feel as though my life is going to "fall into place" very soon. I don't know if that is true or what exactly that even entails but I do know that I am proud of myself for taking this step and am going to continue to look forward..to what the future holds.

Waterloo/Cedar Falls and the in-between time

2011-10-05T11:52:00.000-07:00

Life is good. I mean really, really good. Yes, these past few weeks I have had a range of emotions mostly sadness however, things have turned a page in the last couple of days ever since I got to Minnesota.

My last few weeks in Eugene were very bittersweet. I dealt with my final show with Seth, my final show EVER and saying goodbye to good friends who have become more like family. It is certainly not easy to leave a place you love so dearly behind but now that I have and I am back home in the midwest I am feeling like a brand new person.

I have so much to look forward to! I start my new job at KWWL on October 19th with my first day on air being October 24th! I also found out today that the "Today In Iowa" show I will be co-anchoring just won a regional Emmy Award! I am so excited to work with a talented group of people and a station with such talent and rich history.

These days at home are so rare for me. I have nothing to do and it feels amazing. My car is still in Eugene and I am waiting for it to get shipped here so in the meantime it's lots of relaxing, catching up on emails with old friends and eating my mom's delicious home cooking! I cannot wait to move to the Waterloo/Cedar Falls area and start my new life. I feel so very blessed for this opportunity and to have my family three and a half hours away makes it even sweeter! Please continue to follow my journey!

Change

2011-09-14T19:08:00.001-07:00

These days I am dealing with change.

It's the scary word that starts with a C and has turned my life upside down. I never knew how attached I could get to a place and it's people until I was forced with the option of leaving. Yes, in case you have not guessed by now; I am leaving Eugene and have taken a job in Eastern Iowa at a fantastic television station, KWWL.

The emotions are intense.

Happy to be wanted and the chance to further my career with a talented group of people but also such extreme sadness to leave all that is familiar and comforting. The impact of this decision will be felt in so many ways and so many times--but deep down I hold the reassurance that is IS indeed the way my life is supposed to go. I hurt mostly for the wonderful friends and loyal viewers who have supported me for so long. I know what people say --that your true friends will always be in your life but the fact remains that nothing quite stays the same.

I also have great excitement. A new challenge awaits and I cannot wait to have new adventures and meet new people that I will also grow close to. It's the in between time that is the hardest.

One of the quotes that has helped me deal with this is the following:

"Those who want to be in your life will always find a way--the rest will only find excuses"

I find this comforting when I think of the close relationships that have developed in recent months. That indeed at the end of the day those who really want to come visit, call, maintain contact or generally be in my life will always, always find a way to do so.

A Website I LOVE!

2011-07-21T19:54:00.001-07:00

I would strongly suggest to any of my fabulous female friends to check out the website

singlewoman.net

It's full of inspiration, fun and Mandy Hale's "Dash of Sass"

I thought today's was especially inspring and wanted to share it with you!

Courtesy: singlewoman.net

Quote of the Day:

"If the guy you’re dating doesn’t seem to be completely into you, or you feel the need to start ‘figuring him out,’ please consider the glorious thought that he might just not be that into you. And then free yourself to go find someone that is." ~Greg Behrendt

The Single Woman Says:

When a man wants to be with you, truly wants to be with you – he’ll be with you. Simple as that. There won’t be excuses, angst, drama, explanations, apologies, other women, shadiness, uncertainty, if’s, and’s or but’s about it…HE WILL BE WITH YOU.

When a man is truly feeling a woman, he will make a way. Ain’t no mountain high enough or valley low enough to keep him away. Period. End of sentence.

Sassy ladies, if a man's being shady with you, choose TODAY to cut him loose! A true diva is too busy walkin' on sunshine to chase a man in the shade!

Fox News @ 10 Pay it Forward Challenge!

2011-07-14T19:53:00.000-07:00

When was the last time you did something nice for a perfect stranger? Before you answer that think carefully about the question. A totally selfless act for someone you have never met before and have nothing to gain anything from? Well...... what are you waiting for? :)

This week I had a special challenge for my lovely Fox News @ 10 viewers! I called it the "Pay it Forward Challenge" I asked people to go out, do something selfless and then share the story with me!

The response was overwhelming! From viewers on my facebook page to emails in my inbox I was humbled by the generosity of everyone.

Here are a few of the stories I got.

At the grocery store - an elderly man rode one of those store carts up to his car - I waited in my car until he was done unloading it, got out and offered to drive it back to the store for him. He was very appreciative.

I bought my neighbor breakfast :)

I remembered today as I was going thru the starbucks drive thru. I covered the car behind me and a good tip. I found myself trying to drive away quickly, as i didn't want the car to hunt me down. Yesterday I introduced myself to my neighbor and bought her lunch

Sometime ago, we stopped at our favorite coffee stand. I'm a beaver, my wife a duck. An older couple (like us) pulled into the other side of the drive by with beaver flags on their car. I told the gal in the coffee stand we would pay for the coffee for the beavers. She told
the other couple as we were starting to pull out. The look on their
faces was pricless as they strained to look through and see who would
do such a thing. You never lose when you pay-it-forward.

These are just a sampling of the messages I got! Imagine how one act of kindness can press forward? My example from today is one of them.
I stopped to buy coffee and bought one for the person behind me.

When I got to work one of our reporters said loudly in the newsroom "Sombody bought my coffee today" Turns out she had gone to the SAME coffee stand as myself but the person who bought her coffee was A MAN.! I would like to think that me buying coffee for one person spurred several others to do the same! Today is a blessed day

The Little Things

2011-07-08T19:25:00.001-07:00

Like a sunny Friday morning in Eugene with good friends, lots of laughs and a general sense of happiness. Remember the little things because one day you might wake up and realize they were the big things...

Thought for they Day

2011-07-08T17:14:00.000-07:00

Rapunzel tells us one thing about love climbing the highest tower becomes less difficult if someone at the end gives you reason to hold on.

Love My Friends!

2011-07-06T19:28:00.000-07:00

Coming back from Minnesota had a bit of sweetness in it though. I was greeted at the airport by my friend Kari and a big huge "Welcome Back" bouquet! It took the edge off of missing my family and made me smile.

When I got back to my apartment, I saw that Katie had left it sparkling clean as well! SHE also left me a dozen yellow roses to greet me. I felt blessed that is UNTIL I got to work.

LOVELY FLOWERS FOR ME

Katie is the biggest prankster I know and just look at what she did to my desk! I cannot believe she spent all that time just wrapping things ..it must have taken her hours! It was maddening but made me laugh! Oh friends...you never cease to amaze me!

MY DESK WAS SARAN WRAPPED!

EVEN THE COFFEE MUGS WERE VICTIMS!

Some Bitter Some Sweet

2011-07-04T12:36:00.000-07:00

As I sit here reflecting on my week in Minnesota I realize that I always come back to Oregon with the same feeling. It's always bittersweet and contemplative. Back to the job I love and the friends I miss but, with a heavy heart as I miss the family and friends I leave behind. Though I always know I will come back soon it doesn't change the fact that I am far away from them again.

The week was fun, interesting, mesmerizing, surprising and overall just what I needed to re-charge my batteries...

Minnesota..I miss you already.

Thought of the Day

2011-06-08T19:25:00.000-07:00

Really LOVE this one!

“You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months overanalyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could've, would've happened...or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move on.” ~Tupac

Thought for the Day

2011-06-07T20:16:00.000-07:00

What's truly meant for you, you won't have to grasp too tightly. True love makes your heart sing, not cling.

"Love Shrinks"

2011-06-07T19:18:00.000-07:00

I just finished an amazing book that touched me in many ways. The book "Love Shrinks" is a profoundly moving account of a marriage counselors unraveling of her own marriage. In the book she chronicles all the reasons she decided to stay in her marriage for as long as she did even though deep down she was deeply unhappy.

The book is divided into separate sections in which she headlines "Why I stayed in my marriage" and lists memories and wonderful times that kept her from getting a divorce while other chapters focus on her daily struggles of living the life of her and her husband being more like roommates than lovers.

Her writing is simple yet emotionally charged. It's truly a love story of freedom and the ending will bring tears to your eyes. I haven't read a book I loved so much in a very long time :)

How true is it that we stay in relationships for too long for all the wrong reasons? Perhaps you are comfortable or hoping things will get better or maybe you stay for those good times which become scarcer as time goes on. Whatever the reason this book will open your mind and your heart.

Here is a review of the book
"A relentlessy honest portrayal of what a marriage looks like that should end but doesn't, where the couple should hate each other but don't. With wit, charm and intelligence, Sharyn Wolf examines the reasons she stayed stuck; the old wounds and unmet needs that kept her attached when she should have let go. Love Shrinks is for anyone who has stayed in a relationship too long for all the wrong and yes, sometimes, right reasons. You'll cheer when Wolf finally breaks out. And just maybe it will remind you of someone you know."—Susan Richards, author of Chosen by A Horse

Rhody Fest!

2011-05-24T18:16:00.000-07:00

Can you spell Rhodedendron?

The annual Rhody Festival in Florence, Oregon celebrates this beautiful flower and brings the town together.

Here is what a website I found has to say about it:

The Rhododendron festival celebrates the wild rhododendrons that thrive along the Oregon Coast and officially begins on Friday evening with the Rhody Pageant to crown "Queen Rhododendra." The festival includes a wide variety of fun and events throughout the weekend include parades, flower show spotlighting specimen rhododendrons grown by coastal inhabitants. car show, arts and craft fair, 5K run, carnival and much, much more.

Katie and I headed out bright and early Saturday morning for the festivities and I had no idea what to expect. I never expected to have such a blast! The Rhody Parade brought out tons of the colorful flowers along with floats and tons of performances. Here are some pictures from the event:

The sunshine came out shortly after this picture was taken right in time for the parade!

Florence has a ton of antique stores and Katie snapped this shot of me being totally silly. What a great time! My new friend "Mr. Zebra"

Zumba!

2011-05-19T19:02:00.000-07:00

It's sweeping the county and the world and I gotta say that I too have jumped on the Zumba bandwagon! I LOVE the workout! The music is great and it's like one big dance party. Honestly, if you LOVE to dance and want to get in shape, then Zumba is the thing for you. Right now my gym, Eugene Swim and Tennis only offers in on Wednesdays but I try never to miss it! It's a blast...have any of you tried it?
I am really trying to get in shape and so far this is my workout schedule

Mondays: Step class
Tuesdays: Yoga or treadmill workout
Wednesdays: ZUMBA
Thursday: Treadmill workout
Friday: Rest day or Treadmill

It feels great to be getting in shape!

I'm Back

2011-05-18T17:36:00.000-07:00

A couple of months ago I decided to stop blogging. I am not sure if it was the fact that I thought nobody was reading, or that I just felt like I was putting myself out there too much or what but I simply stopped.

I didn't think too much of it until I got a tweet from a viewer who asked me why I wasn't blogging anymore. It gave me pause. I honestly didn't think anyone was really reading it. He went on to say that everyone he knows reads it. Wow. Of course this could consist of just a couple of people but I have to remember why I started in the first place which was to find a way to share my life with others.

I suppose being a public figure I feel at times I am bordering on "too personal" when it comes to what I write about but then again when I think about it, the things I share come straight from my heart and I have received positive feedback from many of my inspirational blog entries. I think I will keep it up for now and see what happens.

Happy Reading and I am back.

Love you Nani

2011-03-29T17:33:00.000-07:00

Everyone remembers where they were when 9/11 happened and I will always remember the moments of learning about my dearly loved grandmothers death.

It was friday night and I had just gotten home from work. I was bustling around in a good mood since it was Friday and then I checked my phone. My little brother had left me several messages telling me to call him right away...that is how I found out.

I sat in shock for several moments and then the tears came. My nani was a big part of my childhood and the only grandparent I was ever close to. She lived with us for several months and years in Minnesota and I have so many fond memories of her. She was hilarious! Joking and laughing in punjabi about things that were as X-rated as you could imagine and I cannot think of a single person who did not love her instantly when meeting her. She was close to my best friend Pam and even my friends who couldn't speak her language loved her. She had a presence that was larger than she was. She survived many things including losing her daughter a couple of years ago and surviving stomach cancer. We had many long talks together about life and she was there when I needed her most.

She used to call me "thee" which in punjabi means daughter and loved old songs and movies. She was an amazing person..she got married at the age of 13 and went through so many things.

I have a picture in my apartment of the two of us together that I will always cherish. I love you and miss you nani...thank you for all the good times.

Amazing Hair Oil

2011-03-22T16:38:00.000-07:00

Wanted to tell you guys about a great new product I have found to leave hair shiny, silky and Oh-so sexy! You must try The Macadamia Natural Oil™ line of professional hair care products

My sister recommended it to me when I visited her in Minnesota last week and I knew I had found one of those amazing beauty products

The bottle costs about 14 dollars at beauty stores and the line includes shampoos, conditioners and a hair mask.

The secret is in the special Macademia nut oil that offers a light and silky sheen to hair, especially hair that is dry, treated or color damaged.

Give it a try, you will be GLAD you did

Release Your Attachment

2011-03-08T15:43:00.001-08:00

It's a constant struggle for me to release that which is something I desire so badly. This article helps me keep my focus.

Think about something you have gotten easily. You were probably somewhat relaxed, and didn’t get upset every time something didn’t go exactly as planned. You stayed in the flow, and knew everything would work out ok. Positive expectation and a relaxed manner will really go a lot farther than obsessing about every little twist and turn your life takes. Life is full of twists and turns, and they often lead to something better, but only if you believe it and stay in the flow.

Someone in my life once said about attachment, “It’s like being attached to a sunset, and getting upset when it is over. Why? It will rise and set again.” Even if you don’t know when something will happen again, if you believe it will and stay relaxed, then it will come back to you. This happens in my garden a lot. In the past I obsessed over getting certain plants to grow and flower, and I was most often unsuccessful. Due to my many gardening failures, I just relaxed. I watered when I thought it needed it and fertilized on occasion, but I stopped obsessing over how many flower buds were on each plant and what else I could do to make my plants flower more prolifically. Of course, once I stopped this, flowers started popping up everywhere! Of course, I didn’t neglect my plants and I made good choices for my zone and the individual plant’s needs, but I just let my plants grow at their own pace. Now they are rewarding me beautifully, and I am most appreciative.

Take time now to think about areas in your life where you are and have been successful. What emotions and attitudes did you have? How can you translate that over to areas where you still haven’t gotten everything you want?

Also remember, everything happens in its own perfect time. If you haven’t yet gotten what you are desiring, acknowledge that you may be sending negative vibrations, and that it may not be the perfect time. Relax, have faith, and go with the flow! Send positive thoughts towards your goals. Keep them pure with positive energy, instead of cluttering up your goals with doubt and negativity. You always want to feel good about what you are wishing for.

My life is flowing along at the perfect pace for me. I relax, go with the flow, and enjoy life! I love the journey and the destination and release attachment to the outcome. I have fun no matter what I'm doing!

Fox News @ 10 is on Facebook!

2011-03-03T18:22:00.000-08:00

Hello fellow bloggers! I have been so lazy at the blogging and promise to get better! I would like to urge you all to follow my new facebook page! When you "like" it you will be able to get all the updates from Seth and I about breaking news, weather alerts and random fun stuff too.

You need to search for

Natasha Chughtai Fox Eugene

then hit "like"

and you are done!

See you on Facebook

Asian Celebration 2011

2011-02-22T17:08:00.000-08:00

I had a wonderful time at this years Asian Celebration! It's always so much fun to see the amazing lion dancers and the Portland Taiko drummers perform!
This year we did something special and had a moment of silence for Jack Harsongkram and Connor Ausland, two boys killed on the Oregon coast a few weeks ago. Here are some pictures from the event.

I emceed with Liz from Mix 94.5. It was her very FIRST time at the Asian Celebration.

New Friends

With Kayla, she performed an Indonesian Dance!

Carlita!

2011-02-17T18:22:00.000-08:00

It is SO fun to see old friends like this last weekend when I got to see my old pal and co-worker Carla Castano!

She is working in Portland now and continues to be one of the most talented, aggressive reporters that I have ever worked with.! We got together and had a wonderful time --I miss her! Here is a picture from her visit!

Fun Times

2011-02-17T16:12:00.000-08:00

Could I be facing a mid life crisis at 31? Sometimes it darn well does feel like it. I say this mostly tongue in cheek but on days when everything is overwhelming, cloudy and the end is nowhere in sight it can certainly seem this way.

Life however holds unlimited amount of hope and I am seeing these in small but significant ways. These days there is a lot of possibility in the air. It's exciting! I am making a lot of changes and working towards my future and while the unknown can be a little scary, I have stopped fearing change :)

For a long time I was stuck in a rut and going through the motions letting life come at me and guide my course. Now I am taking charge and making my own plans that are not based upon anyone else or any different circumstances.

It's also a fun time. I am getting out, having fun ...Making new friends and exploring new places. I got rid of a futon that I had for years the other day and opening up my space has also opened up my head. Funny how something small like that can make a big difference :)

Have a wonderful day and wonderful weekend. I will be at the Asian Celebration and I would love to have you come join me!

A Heckuva Good Book!

2011-02-14T16:34:00.000-08:00

Ok it's book time! And have I got a fun one for you! I had a wonderful time at the Eugene public library yesterday and it was one of those days where I just happened to score all around! I have had mediocre days (couple good books, a couple duds that sit on your shelf and gather dust) and downright bad days (every single book you pick up bores you to tears within the first few pages) but, yesterday every book I saw was PERFECT FOR ME!

I wanted something light, funny and an easy read and I found it. It's called "Breakup Babe". I know it sounds cheesy and lame but, it's actually beyond hilarious. I stayed up till 3AM reading it. Its a true story about a Seattle thirty something who gets dumped by her boyfriend of two years and starts a blog to help her deal. Her writing is witty, easy and clever and it's hard not be amused by her experiences in the dating world. Here is an excerpt from the book

Sunday, August 11, 2002
12:58 PM Breakup Babe

Hello, my name is Breakup Babe. Tomorrow I get to go to my new job at a large Seattle software company, where my office is right down the hall from the man I thought I was going to marry, who just lied to me, cheated on me, and then dumped me on my f*cking a*s.

That was the paragraph that started it all. I had no idea that starting a free weblog called Breakup Babe would change my life. It was just something to do to keep me sane. But what I’ve learned in the last year is that things never turn out how you envision them. When your life cracks open, like mine did, you’re messed up at first, and because of that, you do stupid things, but you also grow and change in ways you couldn’t before. Then, suddenly, you’re a lot closer to “happiness” than you were–even though “happiness” looks different now from what it did when some creepy-crawly bastard broke your heart.

But let’s start at the beginning, shall we?

And it just gets better from there! I would highly highly recommend this book if you just want a good laugh!

REACH Helicopter!

2011-02-09T23:50:00.000-08:00

I had another wonderful day of shooting Upbeat stories for my series "On The Upbeat with Natasha Chughtai"

The BEST story we shot yesterday was going up in a tiny REACH helicopter to see how the medics transport sick victims to hospitals. These guys are really really heroes! They fly all over the state picking up critically ill victims that they transport to hospitals in the golden hour. I had a wonderful time going up in the chopper and learning all about what these guys do! Here are some pictures from yesterday!

WITH MY PHOTOGRAPHER LOREN RUARK

WITH THE REACH TEAM, PILOT, PARAMEDIC AND OPERATIONS MANAGER

Asian Celebration!

2011-02-02T17:21:00.000-08:00

I am excited to be part of another year of the Asian Celebration here in Lane County. I emcee the annual event every year and LOVE the great food and friends I meet along the way.

This year the theme is "Nurturing Traditions"

I just shot my promo for it and will post it soon but, I hope that you will join me February 19th and 20th at the Lane Events Center in Eugene. Admission is four dollars.

Enjoy a colorful cultural festival February 19 & 20, 2011 featuring more than a dozen Asian heritages through non-stop performances, food booths, Asian marketplace; cooking, crafts, and martial arts demonstrations; a fine arts exhibit; children's activity room, game room, and so much more! Hours: Saturday 10 am-7pm; Sunday 10 am-6pm. Admission is $4, free for ages 12 and under.

Weekend Bliss

2011-01-30T22:56:00.000-08:00

Who doesn't wait for the weekend and rightly so, it's a time to relax, rejuvenate and recharge those batteries! I had a great one this time around. Friday night I got to spend time with good friends and went to a lovely local winery on Saturday. Today was my favorite day of all though, I got the chance to relax and go to one of my favorite places, the Eugene public library! I also cleaned my apartment from top to bottom-it's completely sparkling now. I even scrubbed down the cupboards in the kitchen. It feels so good to be in a clean and organized place. I am also sharing some pictures that were taken of me last week at work by my former intern Ryan. He brought in his state of the art camera and snapped these shots.

Here is just one of my sitting at the news desk!

Laughing up a storm

Before the show!

Just At The Right Time

2011-01-28T16:12:00.001-08:00

I bring up Mike Dooleys notes from the Universe again and again because they are truly amazing and wonderful bits of love that can benefit your life.

If you want to sign up go to Tut.com (they are free)

In the introduction for one of his books he instructs readers to flip to any page in the book randomly and see how it applies to them specifically. Amazingly the notes that he sends out have different meanings to me on different days. Sometimes he is so spot on that it is scary.

Is this coincidence or another one of Gods Winks? Take yesterday for example when I really really needed to hear this.

It wasn't ever supposed to hurt, Natasha. You weren't ever supposed to cry. And I never dreamed you'd sometimes feel so helpless.
Yet, as things have turned out, lots of folks have trouble getting out of bed on cold, dark mornings.
Anyhow, Natasha, should there also be the occasional pain, tear, or touch of sadness beyond that, please realize these were anticipated, bargained for, and even sought after. As each would illuminate your resiliency, prove your strength, and help you blast through every flimsy notion that would otherwise keep you from seeing that even now I hold you in the palm of my hand and that all things are possible.

Such a deal,
The Universe

Yep- that's not just random

The Small Voice

2011-01-26T17:16:00.000-08:00

Where you are right now .. It's exactly where you're meant to be. Trust the process.

Oh how true is this saying? But, how many of us actually believe it. It's so so hard when are in the thick of things to see that perhaps it is best for you. That God is showing you a lesson or making you stronger or paving the way for something bigger and better to come into your life. I see this now as truer than ever. Have you ever taken time to listen to that small still voice inside of you. The one that when you ask a question comes bubbling to the surface but we shove aside?

Call it what you will, intuition, Gods voice or something but if we listened to it more it would guide us and teach us.

It's up to you to listen..About a week ago I asked God for a sign about a decision I was grappling with and now I have it. Though the sign may be painful it's a sign you are on the right path in life. For those of you who feel as though you cannot ask the Universe for what you want, I urge you to try it. Every single time I have--the answer has presented itself in one form or the other.

Ask and it's given. As hokey as it sounds it has come true over and over again in my life.

Skype!

2011-01-26T16:57:00.000-08:00

Skype! Where have you been my entire life!

A friend of mine suggested I use it and after a simple download, I was ready to go. The instructions are very simple and it's quite user friendly. I was able to add a friend in Denver and my family as well. I was a little concerned as to how the quality would be but, it's amazing! I can talk in my normal voice and don't have to yell and it was no problem.

I was so excited to skype with my family. The whole family got together and we talked for about an hour. I was able to show them my apartment, pictures and even some new clothes that I recently bought. I Love SKYPE! I cannot believe I didn't know about it or experiment with it before--it has literally changed my life and for a news orphan who is far away from everyone she loves, it is a true miracle! And to top things off it's FREE...! Whoo hoo...find of the YEAR!

When God Winks

2011-01-24T17:34:00.000-08:00

What are your thoughts on coincidences? Most of the time we don't think of them as anything but that--a mere coincidence. But what if they were much more? What if they were "Gods Winks" to you. A way of telling you whether you were on the right path?
Think about it--if you were God and you wanted to communicate with humans without words how would you do it? How about coincidences and signs? This is the subject of a facinating book I am reading now called "When God Winks" and it explores this theory.

Think about these coincidences in life.

On 2002, Seventy-year-old twin brothers have died within hours of one another after separate accidents on the same road in northern Finland. The first of the twins died when he was hit by a lorry while riding his bike in Raahe, 600 kilometres north of the capital, Helsinki. He died just 1.5km from the spot where his brother was killed. “This is simply a historic coincidence. Although the road is a busy one, accidents don’t occur every day,” police officer Marja-Leena Huhtala told Reuters. “It made my hair stand on end when I heard the two were brothers, and identical twins at that. It came to mind that perhaps someone from upstairs had a say in this,” she said.

In 1930s Detroit, a man named Joseph Figlock was to become an amazing figure in a young (and, apparently, incredibly careless) mother’s life. As Figlock was walking down the street, the mother’s baby fell from a high window onto Figlock. The baby’s fall was broken and Figlock and the baby were unharmed. A year later, the selfsame baby fell from the selfsame window, again falling onto Mr. Figlock as he was passing beneath. Once again, both of them survived the event.

Have you had a God Wink Today?

A is for Ashram!

2011-01-19T17:25:00.000-08:00

ASHRAM! Do you know what that is? I am learning so much about them while reading "Eat Pray Love" which I am sure by now you are getting sick of me talking about. The book is fantastic. Little nuggets of wisdom and purity wrapped inside a story that is both compelling and achingly sad. I want to write like Elizabeth Gilbert! Her words are simple but crafted together so well. I learn not only from her story but also the way she writes. Her style is basically pretty damn amazing.

I love the part where she travels to India. She spends her days inside the quiet solitude of an Ashram- a place of worship where she meditates for hours and has many experiences that bring her closer to God.

Reading this delightful book makes me want to book a one way ticket to India and become a complete devotee, staying in an Ashram forever where I can process all these thoughts that go through my head. In stillness we see things we can never see in haste. I try to take moments of stillness everyday but, it's the type of stillness one can achieve when the only goal you have is to sit in silence for months.

Maybe I should put this on my bucket list? Visit an Ashram..hmmm..something to ponder.

Mani Pedi Fun!

2011-01-12T20:54:00.000-08:00

Sometimes you feel so down that few things can cheer you up. I have been kind of down in the dumps lately and so when my good friend and co-anchor Seth Wayne suggested we go for mani-pedis, I jumped at the chance.

Something about being pampered and sitting with your feet plunked into a hot tub of water with someone else doing all the work is just so relaxing and rejuvenating. I even got a flower painted on one of my toes. It made me realize that I really need to pamper myself more. If I don't do it for myself, well then who will?

Check out my toesies! I had my fingers painted the same color!

Delicious Black Bean Tortillas

2011-01-12T17:58:00.000-08:00

I made these last night and today and they are low calorie, high fiber and delicious and nutritious for you!

What you will need

1-can black beans
1-can diced tomatoes with spices
2- Low carb, high fiber Tortillas, you can find these in the tortilla section in Albertsons
Pinch of salt
pinch of cumin
pinch of cayenne pepper
Tapatio or some sort of hot sauce

Directions
Heat up a saucepan and add black beans and tomatoes,
stir until warm, add cumin, salt, pepper and cayenne
Heat until the mixture is thick and not much liquid is visible
Spoon onto tortillas roll up and enjoy

Fiber powerhouse, low calorie and will keep you full for hours.

Weight Loss Blues

2011-01-11T18:06:00.000-08:00

Why oh why is losing weight so hard?

It seems the only way I can ever succeed is to starve myself to death and then end up gaining it all back in a moments weakness like last night for example. I had done so well all day, low carb, low calorie, feeling like those skinny size 2 jeans would fit me in no time -and then, all of it gone in a moment of sheer gluttony. It was as I was driving home from work and the thought of a taco--just one from Taco bell was almost too much to bear. I couldn't STOP thinking about it and it was almost like the drive thru pulled my car right into the lot. ! Grrrr.

Two tacos and a lot of fire sauce later I stared guiltily at all the wrappers and condiment packets on my couch and let out a loud sigh. Losing weight---HOW HOW HOW? :)

I will get there someday. I did it before but, it was pure resistance and about 800 calories a day. Besides the light headed ness and feeling like faiting on a daily basis, I did alright. I know what you are thinking if you are reading this-totally unhealthy. :)
Alas the journey continues.

On another note I do allow myself a cheat day every week and that was last Saturday. The highlight came in the form of a delicious Oreo cheesecake from Sweet life ...Yummmm...Wouldn't life be great if one pill provided all our nutritional needs and we didn't have to worry about the come hither pull of oily pasta, cheesy pizza or a batch of crisp steaming hot french fries....

I better stop talking about it before I make another bad decision...

So True...

2011-01-10T19:49:00.001-08:00

No one ever gets tired of loving. But everyone gets tired of waiting, assuming, hearing lies, saying sorry, and hurting.

Football Madness and More!

2011-01-10T17:52:00.000-08:00

It's the BIG huge BCS game today and the whole town feels like a ghost town. Businesses closed early, bars are jam packed and everyone is cheering on the DUCKS including me! It's amazing how much this city gets into the local team and I think it's pretty awesome but, I must admit that being at work is a bit of a relief. I don't have to worry about driving or dealing with any of the crazyness--in a way it's a relief.

I woke up this morning feeling a bit strange. I had gone to sleep reading the book "Eat Pray Love" and it's message is so powerful. I loved the movie and the book is even better. I love the concept of waking up one day and taking charge of your life. Deciding that enough is enough and you are going to put yourself first. It's a powerful reminder that we all have a choice as to what we decide to do in our lives. We can choose to be happy or choose to be sad. We can choose to stay or choose to leave.

You can't lose what's not yours, keep what's not yours, or hold onto something that doesn't wanna stay.

Read this off of twitter today and it seemed especially true. I need to apply it more to my own life and situations but, I also have a quiet hope in my heart that I am moving through the stages I need to go through to heal and move on with my life..I'm proud of myself for the accomplishments I have made and the ones to come.

GO DUCKS

Latest Anchor/Reporter Reel

2011-01-08T00:57:00.000-08:00

My latest compilation of my work

Thoughts of the Day!

2011-01-06T18:03:00.000-08:00

Continual, petty criticism is the mark of a small mind; you have to be little to belittle. ~John Maxwell

Today: Stop renting your confidence from everyone else & start OWNING it. Aren't u worth the investment?

There's nothing to fear about rejection. It's either God's protection or a nudge in a better direction.

It's the charm & grace of a strong woman that makes her unforgettable.

Healthy Eating

2011-01-05T17:08:00.000-08:00

So it's day two of my healthy eating plan and I must say in only 48 hours I already feel much different than I felt just two days ago. I have more energy today than I normally have for a weekday and it feels great. This morning I scrambled up three cage-free organic eggs and paired them with two slices of multi-grain 40 calorie toast. I may have added a little bit too much salt but, the end result was delicious and kept me going till about 3PM where I had a bowl full of broccoli and couliflower for lunch. Dinner tonight will be more black beans and more veggies. It's delicious and I am looking forward to meals more than I have ever before! Carbs while not ALL bad really do weigh a person down and can spike blood sugar levels out of control. I recommend starting this program if you want more energy throughout the day and also to lose weight or kick start a weight loss program. This weekend will be tough but, I am already planning out my meals including black bean tortillas and maybe some homemade soup!

One thing is for sure it's time to start eating healthy. I have spent far too long eating complete and total crap! :)

Healthy eating in 2011--bring it ON.

Black Bean Power

2011-01-04T17:01:00.000-08:00

Last night was fun. I came home after a long day, snuggled into my warm jammies and did the most nerdy thing I could think of, read a book and research things online. As some of you know I have been trying to curb carbs and eat healthy and I found several articles online to help me reach my goal. The last few months have brought on some emotional eating that needs to stop! Time to take charge. I have decided to incorporate the following into my meal plan. Though I don't have much to lose I also enjoy the energy rush that comes from eating food such as the ones I will be incorporating into my meal plan over the next few months. Staying AWAY from white pasta, white bread and anything starchy.

Breakfast---egg white omelettes, salsa, and two slices of 40 calorie toast

Lunch---can of stewed tomatoes with hot sauce, half a can of black beans , or cut up veggies with low calorie salad dressing

Dinner--some lean protein and more black beans,

Why so many black beans you may ask? They are a nutrition powerhouse! Full of fiber and low in calories they will keep you full for hours! In fact, I still feel like I could burst from my breakfast which included mixed vegetables with black beans. They are also easy, you can grab a can for under a dollar at any grocery store and full of flavor if you add the right spices to them.

Just read this!

Black beans are not only low in fat, but they're also quite filling due to their high fiber content. This makes them a satisfying way to reduce hunger cravings which can lead to unhealthy splurges; and at only eighty-five calories for a half-cup, they're not likely to pack on the pounds. They're also a good source of protein to satisfy hunger and help maintain energy levels.

Also a ton of water. I have found that drinking Propel flavored water is a delicious way to get my water intake and feel like I am drinking juice! Drink water it's the best way to feel full. I will keep you all updated on my weight loss progress!

Another New Years Picture!

2011-01-04T00:35:00.001-08:00

This is going to be a great year!

2011-Bring it ON!

2011-01-03T18:03:00.001-08:00

It's 2011 and it's hard to believe. A year can seem so long and so short at the same time. Everyone always jumps on the resolution bandwagon when the new year hits but, few of us take the time to analyze what we really want. What are you looking for? What dreams do you have and more importantly what would you feel inside if you already had what you wanted?

Tonight on Fox News @ 10, I plan to share some of my goals for this year and they include but, are not limited to:

Curb the carbs--eat healthier
Organization--a clutter free life
Learn to play the guitar--have ALWAYS wanted to do this
Pay it forward, random acts of kindness---bringing about good to those around me

In my life I am faced with a decision that could bring me immense happiness but fear is holding me back from many things. How do you face those fears? One thing is certain--the decision we make determine the lives we lead. Make sure those decisions are good ones.

New Years 2010

2011-01-02T16:40:00.000-08:00

What a fun night! I headed out to B2 wine bar to see a wonderful local band called "Taste" with some good friends.
It was a great night full of music and laughter.
Now I need to write down all my new years resolutions--2011 is going to be a wonderful year for me, I can already feel it. What are your goals this year?

Breaking News and the Emotions of working in Televsion

2010-12-23T19:12:00.000-08:00

Sometimes working in televsion news can really get emotional. Take today for example. Last night right around 8PM we sent our reporter to scanner traffic involving shots fired and people down in Harrisburg. Today we found out that a father had stabbed his 13 year old son and then himself. What made it even worse was that the father had attempted to get medical help the week before and checked himself into a psychiatric unit only to be released. The bodies were found early this morning by the mother of the child.

I spent all day looking for the boys picture and finally found it on myspace. Seeing his face made the whole incident all the more real. He loved his dog Bandit, loved to run track and play the trumpet. He never even had a chance. I then found his mother on facebook and in order to confirm the boy was indeed the one who I had found..wrote her a message on facebook to see if she would respond.

I have not heard back from her and quite honestly I don't expect to. How hard to lose your entire family and then come home to a facebook message from some random reporter who could never know the extent of your pain. In news we provide a service--informing viewers of what is going on and tomorrow we will shift our focus onto the little boy. Who was Jared Stout? What was he like as a kid, a friend and a young dreamer? They say everyone has a time to go but, sometimes life seems so unjust and fair. As journalists we are at the forefront--telling the stories, seeing the lives devastated and the people that are affected.

It's a job I love daily for it's excitement yet, it's also a job that can weigh heavily on ones heart. Many journalists get out of the business, or turn to drinking to numb what we have to hear.

Jared, though I did not know you, I feel as though I did. The only thing we can do is attempt to bring your short life into the living rooms of people who didn't know you--and tell your story.

Notes from the Universe...

2010-12-22T16:14:00.001-08:00

I sat next to a very interesting man on a recent trip back to Eugene from Los Angeles. We started off talking about the usual mundane things..but, eventually our topics got much deeper and we started talking about our mutual psychology background. I asked him if he had ever heard about the Law of Attraction ..he had not. I proceeded to give him an in-depth explanation about the law and how to apply it to his own life. (It's my favorite topic of the moment!) One person who has deeply impacted my life is author, Mike Dooley. His notes from the Universe inspire and enlighten me every single day. I highly recommend him to all my friends including my seat mate on the plane. They can change your life and they are completely FREE. Here are just a few that I have saved.

It's the "things" you love most, Natasha, the "things" that are dearest to you, that you often allow to define who you are.
Which explains the sometimes insufferable pain caused by their loss.
A wholly avoidable pain.
Ahhh... so hey, now you know.
The Universe

Be at peace, dear Natasha, rest easy, relax, coast and luxuriate to any degree that you can allow yourself, for the day will inevitably arrive when you'll understand all the "reasons" that now elude you, bless the darkness that now seems to separate you, and celebrate the ancient choices that once made you. Just as we do.
Trust me,
The Universe

Have you noticed, Natasha, that sadness in your life has never, ever, not even once, lasted?
It's impossible.
Whoohoooooo!
The Universe

Inner Light

2010-12-16T19:08:00.000-08:00

You know what happens when you let go and let the Universe guide you? Pure magic. I have let go, completely surrendered and yet I have also realized that I alone am in charge of this destiny. Nobody else. I think, I have thought and those thoughts are already leading me to amazing things.

It's Christmastime but, that alone is not what is causing this magic in my heart. I think I finally "get it". I finally understand what the real key is to unlocking my happiness and it doesn't involve a single person on this earth. As soon as I started turning inward (and trust me, this has been literally a very recent event), all my dreams started coming to me. I feel happier than I have felt in a very long time. It's this belief I have that everything is somehow going to magically work out. This process was not an easy one and it's a never ending one. I do urge you today though to figure out what it is you are grateful for, what makes you smile and do those things NOW.

Trim people out of your life that bring you down. Anyone who doesn't support your dreams is not someone you should have around you. Only let people in who bring you light and support. I can guarantee you wont find many....in this world but, even if you have just one..it's better than having a million energy suckers.

My hope for everyone..is Peace...

Rejection is a Nudge in the RIGHT direction!

2010-12-14T19:20:00.000-08:00

Rejection is a nudge in the right direction.

Have you ever thought about it that way? I know I never did. For a long time I took rejection as a sign that I wasn't good enough, pretty enough, worthy enough. I saw it as a reflection of my flaws instead of what it really was, a chance for me to move in the right direction! Perhaps I should be moving smoothly in the direction the Universe is trying to guide me and not resist so much. Over the past three months I have become my own scholar. Learning about myself has brought upon so much contentment and inner strength. I now know that I am shifting and being moved into different areas of my life through what the Universe thinks is best for me. I see signs everywhere and I listen to them with all of my heart. I talk often and openly about this to one of my greatest confidants and my heart is starting to shine again. I am starting to feel as though my life is meant to be incredible and day by day I am getting there. It's pure bliss.!
Listen to your signs...the Universe is speaking to you.!

On another note I had a wonderful time at an "Ugly Holiday Sweater party" this weekend...I didn't really have an ugly sweater but, I went anyways and had a blast being with friends and laughing and joking around. Happy Holidays everyone!

Full Circle

2010-12-10T18:50:00.000-08:00

"You can either look at life like nothing is a miracle or that everything is a miracle"

Have you heard this saying before?. I have heard it many times throughout my life but it's never rung as true as it has these past couple of months. This morning another event happened which made me think of the saying.

I was waiting for my good friend and co-anchor Seth Wayne to meet me for lunch. Being the crazy punctuality to a point, person that I am, I was extremely early, more than 15 minutes. I twiddled my thumbs trying to figure out how to pass the time and figured I would clean out my car. I had a plastic bag in my front seat so I started throwing everything I could find in it. I went through my backseat and then started in on my glove box. As I threw everything inside, planning to sort through it later, I saw something shiny at the bottom of the box. I pulled it out and held it in my hand --reminicing.

It was a sparkly prism heart made of glass. It radiates a different color when it hits the light and it had done a wonderful job of it, as it hung from my rear view mirror for nearly a year.

Back then I was in Alaska and the rainbow that would spill across my passenger seat would make me smile. I remember driving along the roads heading towards Seward in the Alaska sunshine. A feeling of serene calm, a feeling of magic. I had my dream job, I was in the most beautiful place on earth and the beauty I felt inside and out was almost more than I could bear.

But there is more to the story of the simple prism heart.--much more.
It was given to me by someone who I had loved dearly and while the details are not important...the story and significance is. He had tied the heart to my rear view mirror and it had accompanied us through many adventures. Down to Seward, across Anchorage and beyond. The heart hung from the car as we walked in parks and alleyways, frequented restaurants, shared secrets and surprises. Always radiating light --a rainbow even when the relationship was fast becoming stormy.

And then it was over one day. My heart bruised, my world shattered and my faith in humanity gone. I never thought I would be able to recover. Nights were spent crying, days were spend mourning and I felt as though I would never love again. I ripped off the prism heart and dropped it in the glove box, slammed the door, the mere sight of it brought me so much pain. I was broken...or so I thought.

Over the next days and months and years, I slowly grew and built my world up again. It wasn't easy, I was more vulnerable than I had been in a long long time but, somehow I was able to love again and love deeply. My heart found a way to heal and I survived and became so much stronger from it.

As I held the prism in my hand I remembered how hurt and angry I had been that day several years ago. I never in a million years thought I would recover and the mere sight of the crystal would have overcome me with sadness but, now it was nothing but what it was. It held no power over me and neither does that relationship anymore. All the crying and tears and heartbreak and thoughts of "never finding love" again were gone. It was nothing but a distant positive memory. It gave me hope..that despite our struggles and times when you feel as though you will never get over someone or something--one day you will. One day you will wake up and the sun will be shining in your heart and you can forgive.

It's a testament to life that we can move through the ripples of pain and grief and become whole again.

A BOOK to make you smile and A MOVIE that will make you THINK

2010-12-08T19:35:00.001-08:00

I want to tell you about two little nuggets that made me smile. One is a book and one is a movie --both can be very useful and inspiring, at least they were for me.

I checked out the book, "Happy for No Reason" by Marci Shimoff a couple of weeks ago. The book is a conglomeration of all different theories and ways one can be happy. Did you know researchers have found out that everyone has a set happy point that is determined by genetics? Scientists have found that everyone returns to that point eventually despite whatever situations they go through in life-even severe car crashes and paralyzing injuries. The only exception to this is the death of a spouse which can take longer to recover from. The book is more of a workbook with different ideas about happiness. I Loved it. Marci writes with clarity and purpose and she sprinkles stories throughout of people who have overcome challenges and found a way to be happy. I found it really put things in perspective for me and I Loved loved loved it!

Now onto the second one, yesterday I had two separate friends text me the same text within the span of one hour. They both told me to watch the movie "Eat Pray Love". I have not watched a movie by myself in nearly a year and a half but, I thought, why not? (sidenote** how strange is life sometimes? Why would two friends of mine text me at nearly the same time to tell me about a movie that has been out on video for nearly a month? Another mystery of the world that I wonder about)

I figured it was a sign and stopped at the redbox on the way home. What a wonderful uplifting movie it was. I laughed, I cried but, mostly I reflected. Julia Roberts ends her marriage and decides to go visit three separate countries in her quest to find herself. I think it would be wonderful to just pack a couple of bags and take off for awhile. The movie made me think about my own life and all the places I have lived and times I have been alone. I feel a calm inner strength knowing that I have done so many things and survived so many challenges by myself. Had I never moved to Eugene, I would have never gotten to the point of spirituality that I feel now. Everyday I learn more about happiness, self love and asking the Universe to guide me in what I want and need.

Signs are everywhere...what are yours?

Minnesota Pictures

2010-12-07T18:46:00.001-08:00

Minnesota was beyond wonderful...here are a couple of pictures from my 31st birthday party! Here are my sister and I

Friends from High school and other times!

Minne SNOW tah

2010-12-05T12:23:00.000-08:00

From home to back to home again. Sometimes I am not quite sure where home actually is. It feels so much like it when I am in Minnesota. The warmth, the family, the genuine urging to be completely and utterly myself. Then I leave and fly back to wherever I happen to be working and suddenly my emotions shift and I am back to being independent, alone, career minded and driven. Where is home? It's Minnesota--where all is familiar comfortable and in sync.

I am heading back to Eugene after a week in the snowy midwest. I got to spend my first birthday back in the place I love in five years. The week was incredible. Every single day was filled with joy and fun and probably most of all sheer comfort. Home cooked meals, hours upon hours on end of nothing to do but, relax, laughing and joking with my brother and sister...staying up till 2AM. I feel so blessed to have that little nook of love in the world. A place I can be completely and utterly me and never have to worry about love not being reciprocated...bliss.

Friends I have not seen in months came for my party. My good friend from Alaska was there along with my best friend Pam who knows more about me than I know myself sometimes. Old college friends and two very dear friends from high school. Also, aunties who pretty much raised me since I was a child...yes, I am indeed blessed. On the night of my birthday the snow started around 4PM and did not want to let up. We ended up with 8 total inches...cars covered and roads packed full of ice. It was a winter wonderland that I welcomed in my 31st year of life!

I will post pictures soon! I have a three hour layover in Seattle..but, it was a week I will not soon forget. Now as I sit here flying further and further away from everyone who loves me...I wonder..just when I will get the chance to come back. I hope it's soon!

Out of Body Experience?

2010-11-22T18:22:00.000-08:00

Last night I had a very surreal out of body experience that I wanted to share before the details become fuzzy. I think just the fact that my brain remembers every single detail of the event shows me that something strange did indeed occur last night. I had just fallen into a deep sleep after reading a very inspiring book, called "The Law of Attraction in Action". I read a couple of chapters and was channeling positivity and the teachings into my thoughts as I was laying there. At one point, I put the book down and stared up at the ceiling. I asked myself, "what would I want if I could have anything in the world". What if the world was my catalogue and I could choose anything I wanted and bring it to me through my thoughts and actions-what would I choose.

I lay there and really tried to focus. More than material possessions, I found myself greatly wanting certain feelings. I imagined a situation where I felt complete and whole and strong and completely loved. I felt a certain peace come over me and a couple of minutes later I drifted off to sleep.

It was about 3AM when the strange incident occurred. I "woke up" and felt myself in a float like state. I knew I was in my room, I knew that I was awake but at the same time a heavyness had decended on me where I was helpless against the movements of my body. I felt myself sit up in bed, and the cover removed from my body. I slowly drifted down toward the end of the bed and put my hands above my head, as I did a strong force pulled my arms in front of me and over so that I now rested in a hunched over position. I then woke up in my normal position laying in bed but, strangely awake. It really didn't feel like a dream and I had been awake and aware of what was going on the entire time. It happened again a couple of hours later, this time I was walking down the hallway outside of my bedroom...I remember feeling heavy and weighed down but, being completely aware of what was happening. When I "woke up" in my original position in bed, I remember feeling beyond frightened and wished I wasn't alone but, I also had a clarity and peace of mind about the whole thing. I am not sure what exactly happened last night but, it made me feel very small in the realm of the Universe and the mysteries that we face.

I have learned a great deal about myself these last couple of months. I have learned how vulnerable and emotionally fragile I am when it comes to love and emotions but, also how very strong I can be and how I can persevere. Last night's mystery was just another building block on my roadmap of life. A roadmap that will lead me to everything I desire

Long Days

2010-11-22T00:34:00.000-08:00

What a long long day today was. I woke up late but, the hours kept dragging. These days seem extra long--filled with thoughts and quietly laced reflections. No--I wouldn't say it's a bad time, just a time when I am learning a lot more about myself. The learning is manifesting itself in rather interesting ways. Body aches and pains and emotions that are turbulant. All times where one can learn. All growing experiences if we allow them to truly be...and don't fight them. :)

Many The Miles, Sara Bareilles

2010-11-21T17:25:00.000-08:00

This song makes me feel powerful, strong and gives me the courage to know I will survive and move past the hurt..

Thought for the Day

2010-11-18T20:11:00.001-08:00

Sometimes you have to put yourself first. Sometimes you have to feel great love to feel great loss. Somtimes you have to feel the pain of losing someone you really truly love to understand how strong you really are. Sending strength to those out there who are hurting or lost. It's not an easy place to be in but, when you finally wrestle the demons and come out, the world shows you just how beautiful and magical it can truly be.

Sometimes you just have to walk away from what you want, to get what you deserve.

"The best way to predict the future is to create it." ~Peter Drucker

Life's too awesome to waste your time thinking about someone who doesn't treat you right. -Jack Barakat

If u focus on doing what u love & making the highest choices for your life, things have a magical way of working out.

TUT Notes from the Universe!

2010-11-17T16:54:00.000-08:00

Everyday in my inbox I get messages straight from the Universe. It speaks to me and only me in person every single day! Ok---maybe not quite but, I think that these little tidbits are something everyone should enjoy. To sign up go to tut.com

So what exactly are they?

TUT Notes from the Universe started in 1998 as an email sent out weekly to 38 addresses has since blossomed into today's daily Notes from the Universe, sent to over 350,000 subscribers in 189 countries! These Notes are brief passages written by "The Universe," personalized with your name (and occasionally your personal goals and dreams), designed to remind you that you have, indeed, been given dominion over all things.
They are friendly little reminders that bring joy to my day and can for you as well. Here are some examples.! Oh and they are personalized!

Well, actually, Natasha, you were different.
You didn't want a perfect life, a typical life, or even a normal life.
You wanted a one-of-a-kind.
How we doing?
The Universe

When in doubt, Natasha, give, let them have it, surrender, make peace.
When there's no doubt, Natasha, give, let them have it, surrender, make peace.
Did I make life too easy?
The Universe

Just as the acorn existed within the oak, even when the oak was a seedling; and as the oak existed within the earth, even before there were trees; and as the earth existed within the galaxy, even before there were planets... there has never been a time, dear sweet Natasha, when you did not exist within me... during which we dreamed all else into being.

Far out.
Love you.
Well done.
Happy everything,
The Universe

Isn't it your triumphs over adversity, surprise rebounds, and stellar comebacks that you look back on with the most fondness, Natasha? Far more than the easy, cake for breakfast and pajamas in the afternoon, kind of times?
Fondly,
The Universe

The Complexities of Life

2010-11-16T18:07:00.000-08:00

Life is strange. Sometimes that is the only and best way to describe it. Some days it is magical, wonderful and abounding with happiness and others it can be a dark and dreary existance where you wonder what more can possibly go wrong.

If anything, recent event in my life have made me so much more aware of life and it's intricacies. The delicate balance that one must hold to not sway too far into the land of dark or light. I read about inspiration. I listen to Wayne Dyer CD's on the way to work, I journal, I clear my head, I subscribe to email lists that provide me with positive encouragement every single day. I am trying to understand and yet it also eludes me. The bottom line in all the things I absorb is this, one must find inner happiness. Yes, so you have heard it before and it seems so simple and hard at the same time. Somewhere amoung the massive amount of literature on the subject, I know I will figure it out. One day it's going to click for me, that joy comes from within. That no amount of money, love, success or something else will really "do it"

People will continue to hurt you, continue to abuse, continue to belittle and scar and we must rise above it all. But, people will also amaze you, love you, come out of the woodwork for you and show you immense joy. What do you choose to focus on makes all the difference.
Do you focus on lack or do you focus on wealth? Do you focus on the past or do you focus on the right now and the joy in the simple things. Do you have gratitude and the firm belief that everything will simply work out, or do you lament and reel from the pain someone else has caused you.
Another life lesson for me? We create our own destiny. We are a produce of what we focus on.

I am going to choose to focus on what is good-no matter how hard it is. It's a choice. A choice we must make daily...

Moving Day!

2010-11-15T17:20:00.001-08:00

Oh the joys of moving! It's one of those things in life that everybody dreads. Pack the boxes, label everything, U-hauls, and then unloading and getting everything the way you want it in the new place! Just the thought of it is exhausting! BUT, we have all helped friends who needed an extra set of hands to help them move and I was no exception when my good friend and co-anchor Seth Wayne needed me. However, I wasn't prepared for all the clothes he had and all the work it took to load up the 10 foot U-haul :)

While it was exhausting, it was also a really good workout! I ended up helping him for about 3 hours on Saturday and a couple more on Sunday. I know he would help me in a heartbeat ..that is what good friends do!

Eugene Weekly Comes Out

2010-11-09T18:51:00.001-08:00

The Eugene Weekly article featuring me as the "Best TV Personality" came out last Thursday. Since then I have received several comments from viewers and others. It's still very humbling to me. I remember opening the Eugene Weekly last year and thinking how cool it would be to ever be in it. That dream came true for me and I am still glowing from how good it feels to be appreciated.

Here is the picture in the paper:

Work and Life

2010-11-08T19:18:00.000-08:00

Not many people can say that they love what they do. I am very fortunate to love my job. I have always dreamed of being a television Newsanchor and I feel so blessed to have reached my goal. Everyday is a new challenge and I get to put a show together that I feel a lot of pride in. Not only that but, I work with the most amazing group of journalists who are like family in a lot of ways. You do not get into television (at least initially) to be rich, have a normal schedule or have a stress free life but, the rewards you reap are several. Life these days is strange, lots of changes and lots of new experiences but, when I lay my head down to go to sleep, I have a sense of calm. I have achieved what I most wanted out of life. Here are some pictures on the job:

11pm Anchor, Lauren Allison and I at work

Can you spot the creepshark?

Election Night, Campaign 2010

2010-11-04T17:26:00.001-07:00

Many many times the anticipation of something is for worse than the actual event, such is the case for election night. It's the day that everyone looks forward to but, if you work in the news business trust me--you dread it! Not only are you juggling fast flying and changing numbers coming at you faster than a snowball fight but, you must also brush up on the candidates, be familiar with several races and measures and generally prepare for chaos! This year I was so happy to be able to co-anchor with Seth Wayne and not have to read the entire show by myself! PHEW..that instantly put me at ease and took away half the stress of the day. We had our plan in place. First block of news at the desk, second half at the Chroma key wall, then a quick weather hit followed by more news ..however plans on election day always go awry and change. :)

Bottom line though our show looked fantastic on air and I am very proud of the team for putting it all together. Here are some pictures from the big night. Here we are joint producing the 10PM Fox show.

Seth did a great job as my co-anchor! What an exciting night.

The team after all was said and done! What a relief to be done with Election Night!

Humbled and Blessed...

2010-10-31T21:55:00.000-07:00

What a fun and overwhelming weekend! I am humbled and very very blessed to have won the "Best TV Personality" Award by the Eugene Weekly for 2010-2011. I feel especially humbled to have been in the running with the talented Brandi Smith and Marc Mullins who have been in the business far longer than I have. I went to the award ceremony with my co-anchor and one of my best friends Seth Wayne! He is always there to support me and lift me up in life.We started off the night by going out for Sushi at Sushi Ya in downtown...

I'm lucky to have him in my life as a good friend. The ceremony was at the Wow Hall and it was fun to see all the people that turned out. Several awards were given out and when it was my turn I was so surprised when they called my name that I almost didn't get out of my seat! It's humbling for sure..! I have so many people in my life that love and care for me..God is good..and so is life!

Eugene Weekly, "Best of" Issue

2010-10-29T14:31:00.000-07:00

I am humbled and honored to be one of the nominees for "Best TV Personality" in Eugene. I was contacted last week by the Eugene Weekly and one of the photographers came by to take pictures of me for the next issue. The award ceremony is tonight and I am excited and nervous! Will post when I have picturs and find out more. Thank you for all your votes and for enjoying Fox News @ 10!

This song just makes me smile...

2010-10-23T14:40:00.000-07:00

Let YOURSELF be ur everlasting light...!!!!!!!

Two Lovely Bits

2010-10-19T17:57:00.000-07:00

If your life isn't working - make better choices, put up with less sh*t, and expect more of yourself.

---PF Changs fortune cookie for today "Time Heals All Wounds, Keep your chin up"

Processing

2010-10-18T18:05:00.000-07:00

Can we focus so hard on positive thoughts that we forget our pain or past negative ones? This is the question I had on my mind this morning. I have been watching the movie "What the Bleep do we know" that focuses on Quantum Physics and the power of the mind. Much of it is facinating..but, what stood out to me was that one bit. Can we be so hopeful and stand so steady in the face of adversity that we can literally forget pain even very traumatic situations?

Are we being true to ourselves if we do not process through them first? How deep is the mind and how does it interact with the heart. Can anything be overcome instantly even the most painful of situations if we simply choose to move past them. Personally I do not believe it to be true. I think we must go through the "belly of the beast" in order to reach the other side. Our mind can help us think positive thoughts and be hopeful for the future but, processing out your feelings is the only way to assure that you have overcome something.

Thoughts?

Lovely Quotes off Twitter

2010-10-18T15:48:00.000-07:00

I think my blog is becoming that random hodge podge place where I can collect bits of wisdom and things that I Love and want to reflect on later. If you happen to stumble upon it, I hope you can leave feeling a little better from what you read ...

"And think not you can Direct the course of love, For love, If it finds you worthy, Directs your course." -Kahlil Gibran

A man doesn't love a woman because she's beautiful, a woman is beautiful because she's loved.

If letting go was that easy, love would be easy and heartbreaks wouldn't exist.

What is important is not what happens to us, but how we respond to what happens to us." - Jean-Paul Sartre

"All, everything that I understand, I understand only because I love." -Leo Tolstoy

When you feel small and weak, remind yourself that you are a child of the universe who is connected to the infinite source. --Deepak Chopra

Love me without restriction. Trust me without wondering. Want me without demand. Accept me how I am. -Jo Masterson

Messages from "The Secret" Scrolls

2010-10-18T15:12:00.001-07:00

From The Secret Daily Teachings

Do not worry at all about negative thoughts, and do not try to control them. All you have to do is begin to think good thoughts each day. Plant as many good thoughts as you can in each day. As you begin to think good thoughts you will attract more and more good thoughts, and eventually the good thoughts will wipe out the negative thoughts altogether.
May the joy be with you,

Rhonda Byrne
The Secret and The Power... bringing joy to billions

What a Perfect Song

2010-10-15T14:01:00.001-07:00

I Love this new Sara Evans song...

Thought of the Day

2010-10-14T19:30:00.001-07:00

The best sailors are made during the roughest storms. Stay steady. Stay calm.

Reflections

2010-10-12T13:01:00.000-07:00

A blank page can provide a ton of possibilities. What do you want to write about today? Do you want to create a story, reflect on the past, make a to-do list for the day? A blank page is a canvas full of potential. I have been journaling since I was about 7 years old. My first dairy was a plastic vinyl covered one with a huge ballet slipper on the front. It had a tiny little padlock and pink pages with lines. I instantly fell in love with it. The surface felt shiny, the lock made me feel safe. I had a place for my deepest secrets, starting with the very first one-how I really felt about my goldfish, Snowflake dying. My handwriting is wobbly my words full of sadness.

I wrote a song commemorating Snowflake and her short but, very meaningful life. I was 7 and the joy of writing has never left me since. I still have that journal, yellowed with age, padlock broken but, everything intact. A small seven year old just starting on the path of life. Last time I was in Minnesota, I opened the big plastic bin containing what is left of my possessions in my childhood home. Beneath the ballet trophies and awards and newspaper clippings were my journals throughout the years.

I had a flight at 6AM but, I spent the next 4 hours reading through the words of my life. From the goldfish dying, came crushes on teachers, sibling rivalry, crushes on boys, rants about parents and dealing with the culture clash of east and west through high school. I read on. I used to save everything. The clipping from a lilac tree tucked securely in a ziploc bag from my first boyfriend. The purple petals now crisp and some reduced to dust. Little notes from friends taped into a scrapbook. A VHS tape of the very first time I anchored a newscast in Duluth, Minnesota. Prom pictures. The color swatch from when we painted my bedroom, poetry I wrote scribbled on scraps of paper, all of it, reflections of who I was and the buds of who I have become.

So many other writings in my journal of love that was unrequited, or love that was too soon, too young...too fast. At 5AM, exhausted, I put it all away. I closed the lid on the box and dragged the bin laden with heavy heady memories into the closet. I replaced the clothing that lay on top of it and went to bed. I will always have those reminders of me tucked away to reflect on because quite honestly you can never really know where you are going, until you know where you have been.

Bittergirls!

2010-10-11T19:30:00.000-07:00

I'm reading a book right now that makes me laugh!~ It's called Bittergirls and it's co-authored by three women. I bought it about 3 years ago from Goodwill and shoved it in a bookcase where it gathered dust. On a whim while cleaning the other day I pulled it out and read the first page. I couldn't believe how funny it was! It's bascially about break ups and how to get through em. Even though it's not my situation it's still such a fun and funny read, that anyone can get a kick out of it. I would highly recommend consulting the Bittergirls for anyone who is going through a tough time ...or just needs a good laugh..The bittergirls will be there for you every step of the way!

Egyptian Wedding Fun

2010-10-11T18:21:00.000-07:00

What a lovely weekend I had. I was able to take part in a beautiful Egyptian wedding of a close friend and had a wonderful time celebrating with close friends. The wedding was at the Oregon Garden Resort in Silverton which is about an hour and a half drive from Eugene. The wedding was a mix of two different unique cultures. All the meat was Zabiha Halal meat while they also served alcohol. Complete opposites in our culture and faith. I also got to see a wonderful friend Sabine Baji who I have not seen in a very long time...with her three beautiful children whom I adore. I thought long and hard about what to wear and settled on a red dress that I adorned with Pakistani cultural jewelery.

Another cool thing about the wedding? The photo booth! My friend Shenah and I went in and took a bunch of cool pictures with the props that were on hand. We had a blast.

At the end of the night, the bride surprised the groom by inviting a band to come out and play that mimicked Prince (or the artist formerly known as ) :) The wedding was a much needed event for me. I miss my culture daily and it's hard to feel as though I have it when I am in Eugene and not around it much. In Minnesota, I would go to weddings all the time and be around Pakistani food and music and people. Here it is much harder but, I am lucky to have friends that offer a chance to be around it from time to time.

It was a wonderful mix of cultures and I feel blessed to have been a part of it.

Days That Make You Want To Scream

2010-10-09T07:57:00.000-07:00

Some days are just bad days. Ever have one of those days where everything seems to go wrong? And I mean every. single. thing.?

That was my day yesterday and it went from bad to worse. The Law of Attraction talks about this a bit in the movie, "The Secret". It says that when you wake up having a bad day, you send out vibrations from what you are thinking leading to more bad things to happen to you. I guess I can see how this would work. My day started off bad and I just kept the ball rolling. From a paycheck snafu that was stressful to feeling overwhelmed at work, everything just seemed on the verge of collapse yesterday. Honestly had I known it would be so emotional, I probably would have used a sick day, that is what they are for right?

Bad days can be changed with the right thoughts but, had you said that to me yesterday you probably would have ended up getting punched. How do you handle a bad day? What strategies do you implement to overcome them. A sympathetic ear can make a world of difference. I try to do this in my daily life. Whether it be a co-worker or a friend I seem to have a knack for sensing when those around me are feeling off and listening and offering support if I can. For me the day ended with a long, hard cry on my couch. It sounds silly but, the release of emotion can be a very healthy and good thing. Afterwards I felt ready to put the bad day behind me. Here it is 8AM on the next day and lets hope that good thoughts make this day much much better than yesterday.

So Many Books...So Little Time....

2010-10-05T17:39:00.000-07:00

On my reading list are so many books I want to read....here are the top two though!

1.) "No God But God" by Reza Aslan. I first saw Reza on Christianne Amanpour's show, "This Week" which airs on ABC. He is a contributor to the online publication called "The Daily Beast" and is a sharp, intelligent modern Muslim man who is changing perceptions of Islam through his writings.

Though it is the fastest growing religion in the world, Islam remains shrouded by ignorance and fear. What is the essence of this ancient faith? Is it a religion of peace or war? How does Allah differ from the God of Jews and Christians? Can an Islamic State be founded on democratic values such as pluralism and human rights?

No god but God examines how, in the shadow of European colonialism, Muslims developed conflicting strategies to reconcile traditional Islamic values with the social and political realities of the modern world.

Sounds right up my alley!!!! You can also check him out at http://www.rezaaslan.com/

The second book I am dying to read is "The Power" by Rhonda Byrne. By now almost everyone is familiar with her teachings about the Law of Attraction.
The Power is about love. In short, when you love anything, you feel different, and you end up attracting more of the same in your life to love. If you can just focus on love, your entire life will blossom. I cannot wait to get my hands on THIS!

A Book I Cannot Put Down!

2010-10-01T17:10:00.000-07:00

I have a book in my possession right now that I cannot seem to put down. Most of the time when I get a book, I will read a couple of pages and then skip through a whole chapter to get to the parts that I like. I very rarely read an entire book cover to cover unless I really like it and it grabs me in a certain way. This one is WAY overdue to the library and I really do not care. :)

Despite the title of this book, I cannot seem to get enough of it. It's called, "This is not the Life I ordered". It sounds like a cheesy self-help book but, it's more a story of courage.

It's a collaboration of ways four women have gotten over difficult times in life. And I mean serious serious hard times. One woman talks about having her husband die on her when she was 3 months pregnant due to a horrific car crash, another talks about years of abuse as a child by her own father, another about having to recover after being shot. In every story is a lot of pain and a lot of hope. These four women have become fast friends, meeting at each others homes over the past several years and finding ways to cope with loss and change. The book is about that.
Combined with the stories in the book are inspirational quotes the women have come to rely on when times are tough. The bottom line, anyone can survive anything and find a way to move on. Sometimes it really doesn't seem like it. Sometimes you seem so stuck in a bad situation that you feel like you will never get out of it. The book presses you forward, talking about all the hope in the world and the ways that you can move forward from loss and change. If these women can move forward from such horrible things..why do problems that are much smaller seem so insurmountable? It's hard when you are in a situation to look forward but, forward is really the only way you can look.

Here are some of the quotes from the book

What I like most about change is it is a synonym for hope--Linda Ellerbee

INVENT A SECRET LANGUAGE FOR CHANGE

--Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it-this is a kind of death.

CREATING ANSWERS FOR THE DREADED QUESTIONS

--All change even the most longed for has this melancholy. For what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves, we must die to one life before we can enter into another.

KNOW THAT OLD HABITS HATE BEING ABANDONED
--The only thing that makes life possible is permanent, intolerable uncertainly, not knowing what comes next.

This book holds a lot of peace in it's pages for people going through several different kinds of things. I would highly, highly recommend it!

Quote Lust

2010-09-30T20:11:00.000-07:00

I have to find somewhere to put all the great quotes off twitter that I Love!

-- You can choose to see the beauty or the ugly in people... Whatever you choose to see in them is also inside of u.

--Keep your eye on the prize in moments of disappointment. Its a marathon not a sprint! Push on thru!

--Your plans for yourself are so small compared to the plans the Uni-verse has for you. Surrender to a greater outcome!

--Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” ~ Buddha

Running and Veggies

2010-09-30T19:25:00.000-07:00

I got in a great run today. A really fantastic, get your blood pumping, sweat dripping feel so good you want to scream run. It felt amazing! I went further than I ever have and when I got home and collapsed on the couch ..I felt completely accomplished. Running is starting to really become a part of my life. I am proud of myself for making it a habit and getting out every morning even though some mornings I don't even feel like it.

Running gives me time to think and time to clear my head. As the blood rushes through me I feel like nothing is impossible and worry leaves my mind. I could almost go twice a day..if I had the time.

I am also loving these STEAMER bags of vegetables. They go great with running because they are low in calories but, high in fiber and very filling. An entire bag in just around 100 calories..top it with salt and Tapatio and you are set! If I continue the running and the eating healthy..I can see myself reaching my goal weight, maybe even faster than I have set the date for!

Compilation of Anchoring/Reporting Clips

2010-09-29T19:48:00.000-07:00

I strung together a couple of recent Anchoring/Reporting clips and put them on youtube....What do you think

Live Television

2010-09-29T18:42:00.001-07:00

Live Television is almost always Awesome.
I say almost because honestly last nights newscast was one of the highlights of my career (or so she says so sarcastically)

Somehow right after my first block of news, someone over at FOX forgot to press the button that takes us to commercial break (if you work in production please excuse my complete simplifying of the process)

Anyways, imagine this...news is read, tease is read and then you go to commerical. Basic..simple right? Instead viewers got a complete behind the scenes look at what happens between the show. Seth did mic checks, I adjusted my dress, texted on my phone and Pete the cameraman did a cameo trying to roll up wires. We didn't even know what had happened until Seth started receiving a million text messages from viewers commenting on his gorgeous eye color (close up camera shot)!

Mortifying? YES! Now for the good part...things could have been damn near disasterous! Normally during commercial break Seth and I are talking up a storm about everything under the sun. We could have been talking about ANYTHING...Not only that but, I also have been known to drop the occasional swear word during break as well! Lesson learned BIG TIME!
Never just assume you are off air if you are in the newscast..You never ever know what could happen!!!!!

Digital Camera Blues

2010-09-28T17:21:00.001-07:00

Not having a working camera almost feels like I am missing an arm! I bought a nice Sony Cyber shot two years ago and for some reason it's already showing signs of wear and tear. Part of it is my fault..a part of it broke off and left the wiring exposed which means anything could have gotten into it and caused it be to acting so funny. It now takes blurry, fuzzy pictures and is simply not reliable. Boo. Now, I am in the market for another camera and I cannot believe how many choices I have. I want something under 150 dollars, at least 8 megapixels, stylish and small and overall RELIABLE...Any Suggestions?

Running and Pain

2010-09-28T16:45:00.000-07:00

I refuse to look at anything anymore as a setback but, this is a minor bump in the road. I may have injured myself during running and have not been able to run for the last two days. I first noticed it yesterday morning. I laced up my shoes, got on my workout gear and headed out the door...a few steps into it however I noticed a very prominent pain in my stomach area just below my belly button.

Figuring it would go away, I just kept going but, found that after a few more steps I couldn't go any further. I managed to walk a couple of blocks but, was pretty disappointed in my inability to run. Today I did the same thing and found the pain to still be present. I'm not quite sure what it could be ..I may have pulled a muscle or simply overexerted myself ...But, it does take away from something I Love to do. I will try again tomorrow and hope the pain will be gone by then. It's strange because it only happens when I run..the rest of the time it's not even noticeable.

A Series of Lessons

2010-09-27T19:02:00.000-07:00

If you really think about it life is simply a series of lessons. We learn and grow till we die. Some of us grasp things earlier in life than most..and for others, the learning only comes when we are faced with adversity. Lessons are everywhere and so are signs. You cannot deny a larger power in this earth when you really start to observe and listen to the signs you face. There are no accidents. I am focusing on letting go. It's not easy. In my job and in my life I have always had to have control. Control makes me feel safe, it's predicatable, it means the sun will rise the next day and a certain set of events will unfold that make me feel secure. No more. I am working on letting go. Letting the Universe seal my fate. No I will not completely relinquish control..instead I will ask for what I want..and then TRUST that it will come my way.

Right now in this very moment I could choose to worry and be upset. I really could but, I wont. I will not allow myself to fold or to even worry about a folding occuring. I am strong.

I find strength in so many things. A simple cup of coffee, a friends smile, laughing at work ..joking around with people..they make me realize that no matter what the outcome, life does go on.

Today I sat at a local coffeeshop ..drinking my medium roast Java..sitting outside in the sunshine and watching the cars pass me by. For some reason I had the inclination to look up at the sky. I whispered a wish of intent to the Universe and it hit me how vast the sky really is. Millions of dreams huddle under that vast sky and mine is just one among many. But, I refuse to settle for anything less than happiness and I do firmly believe it's out there.
No I will not crumble.

I am also loving twitter! Every single day I can log on and see inspirational passages from people I admire! How can I not feel blessed. Those words come to me and instantly lift me up and give me perspective.
Here are just a few

-- "A clear vision, backed by definite plans, gives you a tremendous feeling of confidence and personal power." - Brian Tracy

--Holding on to anything is like holding on to your breath. If you don't let go you will start to suffocate

---Put yourself in the hands of the universe--then you will have no need for control.

Fall seven times, stand up eight. ~Japanese Proverb

Signs are everyone...do not ignore them. Pay attention to the signs in your life and the people who love you. Those are my thoughts for today.

A Little Better Each Day

2010-09-21T19:21:00.000-07:00

Am I a runner yet? Probably not but, wow am I getting there. I am starting to feel that guilt settle in if I don't go for my run every morning. Granted I am still only going about a mile per day and it's not running the whole time but, I can tell from the way my legs feel afterwards that I got a workout in. I try to push myself a little further each day. Today I ran further than yesterday and everyday I add a few more steps. My breathing seems to be getting easier too. I don't huff and puff as much anymore and I never have to use my inhaler. I used to kinda roll my eyes at runners before (um are they just showing off or what) but, I am starting to get it. Running is actually a lot of fun IF you stick with it. I read a statistic that 80% of runners quit before 4 weeks are up..and that is JUST when they are getting good at it. I will not let myself quit. I have gone this far and I am going to keep on going!

Perspective...Pass it on

2010-09-17T19:36:00.000-07:00

I am surrounding myself with inspiration. And it seems that ever since I decided I wanted more in my life, it comes to me. Just today, the 11pm producer sent me a link on youtube to listen to the amazing "Last Lecture" by Randy Pausch. He was a professor at Carnegie Mellon University and also an amazing speaker. He speaks with humor about the fact that he has mere months to live. His attitude is unbelievable. How do people when faced with the greatest of hardships manage to see the light? What amazing strength of spirit. And yet I sit here and find hardships in my day to day life. I sit here and say, "I cannot overcome this" and it's something so minor.

Randy holds up a picture of his family in one of his very last speeches and introduces his children one by one. They are all under the age of 5. Then he introduces his wife and he says with humor and a smile, "Here is my widow"...and he literally beams with the assurance that everything is going to be okay.

I admire him for his courage. Perpective...pass it on.

I am also reading a book called, "Heart Broken Open" It's a memoir by Kristine Carlson. She is the widow of the late Richard Carlson who wrote the book "Don't Sweat The Small Stuff" It is her journey of grief. Her journey from learning of her husbands death to telling her two teenage daughters to going through the gut-wrenching grief process to finally accepting and embracing the pain that comes with loss.

These are all stories of such courage. How will you handle what comes your way? What legacy will you leave on this earth? Think about it.

The Joys of Food

2010-09-15T17:47:00.000-07:00

Why oh why oh why does food have to taste so damn good? Honestly if we could get all of our nutritional needs met by taking one pill a day and never have to worry about the choices and the preparation and the guilt and pure pleasure of food ..Life would be a far simpler place.
Simpler? Of course but, satisfying probably not.

Compared to most people I do not eat very much ..At least not during the week. My meals usually consist of the following Monday through Friday

AM water after my run and coffee with cream around 11 or so.

2:15PM Arrive at work

2:30PM stomach starts grumbling and I start obsessing over what to eat.

3:00PM Afternoon meeting, reporter and other producer discussing ideas. Me, thinking about food and wondering if my food drawer contains anything exciting

3:30PM Heating up a can of soup in employee break room. I literally live on cans of soup during the week. They are quick and easy and normally quite filling. My favorite these days are the Select Harvest soups by Campbells. The Tomato Bisque is to die for especially when you add a generous helping of Tapatio (and I mean a generous, generous helping)

4:30PM Looking around for other bites to snack on. Usually end up eating more than my fair share of croutons, which means almost the entire bag if I am not careful

4:35PM Realize I have almost finished the bag. Quickly put it away and look around nervously to make sure nobody else saw me scarfing down in quick succession.

6:30 Record FOX promos

6:45PM Finally time for my one major main meal of the day! This usually consists of a bag of salad that I purchased that morning, a bottle of low calorie salad dressing and the rest of the croutons from the bag. I pair it with green tea and am one happy camper.

I am usually good then till the newscast with a couple more cups of green tea to get me through but, it's the AFTER the news that gets me every single time. I am always starving by the time I am driving home. Granted it's because I haven't eaten for about 4 hours and it's natural that I would be hungry. It doesn't help that the ever so tempting burrito filled taco heaven of a place known as Taco Bell is directly on my way home!
Oh God.

I admit I will stop there 1 or 2 times a week and get something for late night munchies. I know your not supposed to eat that late but, sometimes you just cannot help it!

It may not seem like it but, I more than make up for it over the weekend. What can i say I like to eat! And a lot of the time it's fast food or grilling steaks or making pasta at home. Food is such a big part of our lives and such a big part of every single culture. Can you imagine being without it.

I remember when I was on the water fast for 5 days and how strange it felt to not be eating. It wasn't even that I felt that hungry it was more that I had no idea how to pass my time. Most of us look forward to our next meal or grabbing coffee or making that sandwich but, when that was taken away from me I had to find other ways to pass that time.

What is your favorite thing to eat? What would be hardest food to live without?

Another Day on the Job

2010-09-14T19:25:00.000-07:00

What a busy day! I cannot believe today is only Tuesday. It certainly already feels like it should be Friday..this week is a-draggin.

Today I am producing the KVAL 11PM newscast because the anchor called in sick. A co-worker of mine who usually reports during the week is anchoring my show. It's always a little strange to produce and anchor a show you are not used to but I must admit I am proud of myself. I got the show done in less than 2 hours and can now just focus on fine tuning it! :) I think I have a very Type A personality when it comes to timing. I have to do things in a certain order and in a certain way. I like to have my show done at a specific time and at 8:30PM sharp everynight I go and do my makeup. :)

We use a software here called ENPS. It's basically a systematic way to produce our newscasts. People are usually so shocked by how precise and exact our timing has to be. If we are even ten seconds off it can really throw a newscast. Back to producing the 11.! Watch tonight if you can :)

Eid 2010

2010-09-13T19:14:00.000-07:00

Eid has come and gone and again I am amazed by how quickly this year is flying by. Just last week I was feeling a little upset that I wouldn't have anywhere to go on Eid and quite the opposite turned out to be true. I had a wonderful day full of friendship and love.

The day started out with the Eid prayer at the Abu Bakr Al Siddiq Mosque here in Eugene. It's basically a converted house with seperate sections for men and women. As soon as I walked in I saw several people who I had not seen in a long time as well as some new faces. We all lined up in rows for the Namaaz. After the Eid Namaaz is a special Takbeer which is basically a recitation of parts of the Quran along with a speech on Eid. It was so hard to hear what the Imam was saying because the speaker in the womens section was spotty and so everything came out cackly and convuluted :)

After the Takbeer loads of food was brought into the womens section. Everything from baklava to delicious pastries and coffee. After all people have been fasting for 30 days and this celebration is all about the FOOD!

Everyone ate and socialized and laughed. It really was heartwarming to be around fellow Muslims and take part in such a joy-filled occasion.

A friend of mine, Alia and I decided to meet for lunch in a couple of hours at the local Chilis restaurant so I went home and changed and met her and some other friends for lunch. I really was feeling on top of the world surrounded by good friends and having the day off to boot! I also talked with my family back in Minnesota as they were enjoying Eid as well. The Muslim population in Minnesota is huge and they were having a blast with friends that they have known for years.

After lunch it was off to the grocery store to load up on items for a special dinner I was making. With red potatoes, beef tips, yogurt, and spices you can make an INCREDIBLE curry dish called Aloo Goshth.
I got all the stuff and came home and started cooking. I could literally spend hours listening to music and cooking something delicious and cleaning house. Something is just so relaxing about it!

I also made some Saffron rice with vegetables to go with the dish. It all turned out delicious!

Though I didn't expect to get anything for Eid I got some wonderfully sweet presents from Trinidad! I was touched beyond belief that he thought about me on my special day. I feel blessed. Overall, Eid this year was beyond my expectations.

Coincidence or Something Much Much More?

2010-09-10T18:47:00.000-07:00

I am learning. I am learning a lot. People talk about awakenings all the time. They talk a lot about that one moment that defines everything. No, I have not reached that moment. There has been no lightbulb that went off, no instant realization that everything suddenly makes sense. No...it's nothing like that. But something has changed. I suddenly understand the power that is within me.

I may have looked at someone in my shoes a couple of years ago and thought they were hokey or that they were too "out there" for me. It's really nothing major. I just have some new hope in my heart. I am starting to understand how much we create our own reality. And it's really like the world is responding to my new understanding. Just in the last couple of days some minor things have happened that in the past I would have never even given a second thought to, now they seem to reinforce my new belief in things. Today while I was sitting with friends having lunch I instantly thought about an old friend of mine and for some reason I remembered a particular shirt that she would wear. It was blue with white stripes, nothing too unusual but lo and behold as soon as I had the thought if not mere moments later, I look up and see our waitress wearing the exact same shirt.
Coincidence? maybe.

But what about the television program I was watching today about Lottery winners. I suddenly thought to myself, "wow if someone was single and they won the lottery it would be so hard to figure out if someone wanted me for my money or not." I went on to think "If I was in that situation I would not tell anyone that I had so much money in the bank and only tell them after they proved they loved me for me..and not my money"...the very next story was about just that. A lottery winner who chose not to tell his significant other that he had so much money in the bank.
Coincidence? Maybe.

But what about yesterday when I knew for a fact that the words out of a producer at works mouth were going to surely without question be the words "Islamic Conspiracy"?
These things happen all the time. Songs on the radio....a friend who you have not spoken to in ages who calls you on the phone..out of the blue.
How do YOU explain them.

I used to explain them as coincidence. Now...I'm not so sure.
Now I think it's all the reality that we create. Every single thought has a wavelength..has energy...sends out a signal to the Universe...
Just imagine what you can create..if you really learn to channel your thoughts into what you really really want out of life.

Just imagine.
Just imagine.

Ask. Believe. Receive

2010-09-09T20:14:00.000-07:00

This morning was a very spiritual one for me. For the past week or so for those of you who have been following my journey, I have been attempting to apply the "Law of Attraction" to my life.

It is not an easy process. It is a complete shifting of the way I have always thought and I find myself sometimes slipping back into negative thought patterns and worrying about things that are completely out of my hands. It is not easy and yet it is easy. When you have a negative thought acknowledge it and then switch your positive button on. You have a choice. I am learning this slowly. But, it is not just your thoughts. You cannot just think positive and expect the "Law of Attraction" to work for you. You must also feel it. Feel how you would feel if you already had what you wanted.

I needed a boost this morning so I popped in the DVD of "The Secret". While the movie just touches the surface of the law it was enough to jumpstart my feelings of positivity. I also lit a candle and for a couple of minutes closed my eyes and visualized what I wanted. I imagined myself feeling like I already had what it is that I desire. Lets see what it brings about. I am going to do this daily. Wish me Luck. (Oh but, wait I do not need it because I firmly believe these things will happen in my life)

REMEMBER Ask, Believe, Recieve

We can do this by first and foremost being GRATEFUL for what we already have. This will shift your focus to a focus of happiness almost instantly

What are you grateful for? Here is my list.

For the most amazing family that loves me and would do anthing for me

A job that really is something i strived for for so many years and I finally reached my goal

Food anytime I want it and not having to want for anything

Health
I have hardly any health problems and I am so lucky

I have many amazing and wonderful friends who love and support me. Thank you God for these people

I have eyes to read and hands to do things with. How many people do not?

I have amazing LOVE In my life from someone special to me.

Write down your list of what you are GRATEFUL for. I guarantee it will change your perspective.

One day of Peace ...The Next of Hatred

2010-09-07T19:32:00.000-07:00

It's a big day this week! Eid Ul Fitr is this Friday! For those of you who do not know what Eid is..

EID is a Muslim holiday that marks the end of Ramadan, the Islamic holy month of fasting (sawm). Eid is an Arabic word meaning "festivity", while Fiṭr means "to purify"; and so the holiday symbolizes the purification after completing the fasting month which is after the end of the Islamic month of Ramadan, on the first day of Shawwal.

For the first time in my life I will be celebrating Eid alone this year. I don't really have anyone here in Eugene to spend it with..but, I am not upset about it at all. I may go to the local Mosque for the Eid prayer and then spend the day happy and content. It really is about your relationship with God instead of people. I have some reflecting to do and some things to think about. No I am not upset. I feel fulfilled.

That day will be a good day. The next day, thousands of miles away in the town of Gainesville, Florida, one pastor will command his people to grab our holy book and light it on fire. He will set ablaze the words brought down to the Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) in the cave of Hira.

The Koran (also spelled Qur'an), the holy book of the Islamic religion, was written by followers of the prophet Muhammad (c. 570–632). From 610 until his death, Muhammad received visions from Allah (God). Muhammad's followers recorded these visions in what is now the Koran. Although parts of the 114 chapters of the Koran were recorded during his lifetime, the final version was compiled after his death. Muslims (the term for members of the Islamic religion) believe that the Koran is only a copy of an eternal book that is kept by Allah in heaven as his complete message to humankind. Half poetry and half prose, the Koran has a powerful effect on listeners when read aloud. Nonbelievers often demanded that Muhammad perform miracles, but he explained that he was an ordinary man—not God. According to Muhammad, the Koran was a miracle because of its perfect use of the Arabic language.

It's a book that has ispired millions. A book where Allah condemns the cutting down of trees during war. Where woman were given property rights before any other religion...where giving a dog a little bit of water will earn you the right to Heaven...

The "root" of the word "Islam" in Arabic is SALAMA which is the origin of the words Peace & / or Submission, a submission to God and peace to all humanity. It is, thus, no wonder why the salutation in Islam is: "Al-Salamu Alaikum or Peace on You."

But on that day, Peace will be set ablaze as millions around the world watch. Feelings will be deeply hurt, violence will careen through the streets of Pakistan, Iraq and Afghanistan perhaps even the United States. Hatred will sweep over countries, societys and everyone will react differently.

I will spend Friday in peace and pray and pray and pray for what happens the day after.

Inshallah.

What would Anne Frank say about anti-Muslim rhetoric?

2010-09-06T19:55:00.000-07:00

I am re-printing this article because it struck a chord with me. Until now anger has been my primary emotion when I think of how stuck some people are in beliefs. About how some people can take the actions of a few and lump an entire religion into a category. My new emotion is fear. A slippery slope of hatred that is gaining momentum. What can we do to stop it? What can any Muslim do? I try to do my part to educate. I try my best to clear misconceptions. Will it ever be enough? When I was a teen I was facinated by the Holocaust. I read every single book on the subject. I read "The Diary of Anne Frank" over and over again. I read "Night" by Elie Wiesel and cried at the cruelty we inflict on each other. I couldn't imagine how the hatred in one persons heart was enough to infect an entire nation. Small minded people who needed something to believe in began to see the Jews as a real enemy. Young innnocent children, defenseless women, it did not matter. I am not even as devout a Muslim as I wish I could be but, the magnitude of this hatred is out of control. What can Muslims do to stop the spread of hate before it takes over?

Article reprinted below

Anya Cordell , the recipient of the 2010 Spirit of Anne Frank Award, imagines what Anne Frank would say to the growing anti-Muslim sentiments in the U.S.

THEN WHAT? The Consequences of Lighting the Anti-Muslim Fuse

“How soon do we expect that Muslim children should renounce or denounce their parents,

and how are they to arrive at the supposed wisdom of this renunciation?”

“If I were Muslim, I’d kill myself.” No, that’s not what was said. It was: “If I looked like him, I’d kill myself.”

The speaker was my favorite uncle, commenting on an overweight man, across a hotel pool. Considering how much self-talk I had engaged in to convince myself to be seen in a swimsuit, visiting my California relatives, I absorbed this pronouncement in shame and silence, trying desperately to hold onto shreds of self-worth.

This statement by a member of my fashion and beauty obsessed family epitomizes why I’ve devoted myself to efforts against what I call “appearance-ism”, or appearance-based judgments of ourselves and others. On some level, I actually feel that my life is at stake, at least a life with any sense of worth and joy, in the ‘imperfect’ body I have. I’ve also come to discover that appearance-ism is a universal experience, that even great beauties are objectified in our culture, that almost everyone can relate in some way to the injustice of judgments based on appearance and thereby come to deeper understanding regarding other forms of bias.

So that became my mission; to teach what I most need to learn. But it’s taking me a long while, and I’m not done yet.

The man at the pool could have been a brilliant cancer-curing scientist but apparently that didn’t matter in light of his fatal flaw. Although the man and I could have fixed ourselves up a bit with diet, exercise, spray-on tans, maybe even liposuction, I often think of all the ways in which we humans are, AS IS; the size, shape, color, configuration and ethnicity we naturally are, with which we need to make peace in order to walk in the world, not feeling we’d be better off hidden or even dead.

Babies are born into families, with genetics, histories, heritage and often, religion, and they haven’t much choice about what to do about any, or all, of that for a very long time, if ever. Is it a crime to be born into a particular culture or religion? Is it currently a crime to be born a Roma? (Apparently, it may be.) Was it a capital offense to be born a Jew, at the time of the Holocaust? In essence, it was. And is it now, absurdly, the fault of every child born to a Muslim family to have the audacity to be what they simply are? How soon do we expect they should renounce or denounce their parents, and how are they to arrive at the supposed wisdom of this renunciation?

The pronouncements about “all Muslims”, flying fast and loose these days, seem to hold some hope that Muslims disappear by some magical device that would be a really good idea, if only it were real. Or maybe, unlike leopards, they could change their spots, just stop being Muslim. I heard a renowned “expert” on Muslim affairs say that getting rid of all Muslims wasn’t “practical”, while he inferred it was desirable.

There are those who assert that all 1.5 billion Muslims are more concerned with hating, converting and destroying others on a daily basis than with simply living, eating, supporting their families, and doing what most everyone on Earth does. If that were true, wouldn’t they be achieving vast amounts of destruction in communities worldwide? Instead, the very people who characterize Muslims as being hateful and bent on world domination are themselves the most hateful and bent on converting all Muslims (if they won’t just do themselves in, as my uncle thought the man at the pool ought to do, sparing us the unpleasantness of having him in our sightlines).

When I hear the presumptions about all Muslims these days, I, a Jewish woman, silently substitute “all Jews” and then I know how terrifying and incendiary this language is, because we’ve already seen how these scenes play out, in all too horrific reality. Will those who are screaming the stereotypes the loudest take responsibility when people accept their cues and assume they have license from society to target innocent Muslims in hate-crimes, or worse?

I’d like to ask the Muslim-bashers, “Then what?” after every pronouncement, and push them to follow their vision further down the path. After our culture makes it clear that we abhor all Muslims, and we abhor everything we believe that they believe, then what? After we’ve made it clear that all who are born Muslim, that all who call themselves Muslim, (we don’t bother to ask them what this means to them), are unwelcome in our midst, then what? After we’ve made it clear that unless they cease to be themselves, we’re not sure they deserve to be, at all, then what?

Just as my uncle wanted the man to disappear (or destroy himself—but out of our vision, so as not to ruin our vacation day), many apparently wish that Muslims would disintegrate into thin air. But this is not going to happen, so, then what? And after Muslims worldwide have absorbed progressive shock waves of all the hatred and condemnation, and after some of them internalize the trauma and respond, then what? What do we imagine happens next when people are treated as Muslims are, currently?

We are on a precipice, looking over the edge. Humans have stood on this precipice before. We know about the times when people were willing to—or were manipulated to—push others, many others, over the edge.

The perpetrators of 9/11 were at this precipice, and they were willing to generalize that their victims and the daily lives of those victims’ loved ones were worth sacrificing for some bigger vision. They didn’t care to know the particulars of the individuals they destroyed, even the Muslims, they destroyed. They couldn’t be bothered with facts. Whether their targets were brilliant doctors, scientists, artists, or extraordinarily kind individuals was of no consequence. They didn’t have the willingness to be patient, thoughtful and careful of the consequences of their actions. They felt some crisis or critical condition required them to act immediately and unquestioningly. How then, does frantic and careless generalizing and stereotyping in any way contradict the tremendous and horrific suffering which nineteen perpetrators, and those manipulating them, engendered?

Some white guys have committed extraordinary destruction; guys like hooded Klansmen, or Jim Jones, or Timothy McVeigh. Guys like Benjamin Smith, the white supremacist who killed my black neighbor in 1999, or Frank Roque who murdered an innocent Sikh man on September 15, 2001, simply because he wore a turban and Roque was out to “kill the ragheads”, or Mark Stroman who murdered two innocent men, one Muslim and one Hindu and blinded a third man, after 9/11, claiming he was a patriot, doing what others wished they could do, if only they had his “nerve”.

I know the families of five of these victims. I know where their “ground zeros” are, and how the exigencies of daily public life have reclaimed the locales where these family’s lives shattered into pieces. No memorials set them apart as hallowed sanctuaries. In innumerable “ground zeros”, the world over, families have clawed at earth with bare hands, desperate to rescue or recover their loved ones, but these families don’t ask for anything other than the hope of putting one foot in front of the other and moving sadly forward from unspeakable tragedy.

In response to the acts of terrorism committed by the white guys mentioned above, there are not wholesale smears of white guys. That would be absurd, because we know that white guys are individuals, no two are alike. But isn’t religion a common, shared belief in basic tenets? Well, judging from the disagreements and controversies that are rife in every family, organization and religion—sects within sects, differences of interpretation, ritual and practice—how can we possibly ascribe unanimity of belief to fully a fifth of the world’s population? Do we insist that all Jews and Christians are in complete accord with every line of the Old and New Testaments, with no variables in interpretation, as the Koran is now selectively quoted as supposed proof of every Muslim’s flawed makeup?

If this mass of people refuses to disappear off the face of the Earth to accommodate non-Muslims, then what? What do we really want of Muslims? All the Muslims I know grieve September 11 rather than celebrate it, which they’ve been accused of doing. Additionally, they feel constant suspicion directed at them as they try to live their lives while absorbing the shame and blame now heaped upon all Muslims, worldwide. They are between a rock and a hard place, damned for whatever they do or don’t do. And they are afraid. Following a school presentation, a student whispered to me, “Thank you so much for your program. I’m Muslim, but no one here knows it.” Chilling.

Since 9/11, the anti-Muslim drumbeat has impacted vast numbers of innocent Muslims, Sikhs, Hindus, Arabs, South Asians and others. We, who despair when our children are teased and bullied, are accepting and repeating despicable slurs about others, ricocheting through our culture. I felt compelled to stand up against people being attacked, even murdered on the basis of snap judgments. I felt compelled to reach out to the families of people I didn’t know, across the country, and to speak about their losses. For these efforts and for my work against appearance-ism and the designating of any group as “Other”, I received the 2010 Spirit of Anne Frank Outstanding Citizen Award from The Anne Frank Center USA

Whatever one feels about the placement of the Islamic Center in lower Manhattan, why, I want to ask, is there almost no outcry about those who are reaping money, power, prestige or votes via the incendiary vitriol with which they are soaking the culture like gasoline only requiring a single match to become a conflagration?

I believe I know what Anne Frank would tell us, if she could, about the smears, stereotypes and generalizations now being shouted so incessantly, and about the times when people have had to try to “pass” or hide, to be safe. I believe she would say that just because many people scream something does not make it true. I believe she would point out the tremendous disparity between the Nazi stereotypes of Jews, and the real Jews, like her, who were destroyed by such propaganda, and the practices and policies that flowed from it.

I believe she would remind us of what happens when generalizations are carried to their conclusions and when it seems politically impossible to speak out against those who are shouting the loudest. I believe she would take note of leaders backing down from principles, each one cuing the next that this temerity is in accord with the tenor of the time. I believe she would grieve that Jewish organizations are not speaking out against the dangerous climate, and instead are participating in it.

I believe she would beg us to be allies for those who are not our ethnicity, our religion, our ‘tribe’—as the non-Jewish friends who supported her family in hiding took extraordinary risks to be her ally. I believe she would exhort people who have never even met a Muslim not to accept wholesale characterizations, and to befriend Muslims.

I believe she would warn us of a very slippery, very dangerous slope, and she would remind us what happens next, and next, and next, as the progression unfolds incrementally but inexorably—the progression that starts with offhand remarks, then slurs, then stereotypes, then diatribes, then what? We ought to have a clear idea of such a progression by now, hopefully not one we’ll only grasp later from a left-behind diary of a Muslim adolescent, who simply desired to walk in the world safely and openly.

"Choose Them Wisely" by Mike Dooley

2010-09-06T09:42:00.000-07:00

I am reading a facinating book right now. It's called "Choose them Wisely" by Mike Dooley. I found it in my favorite section of the downtown Eugene public library yesterday.

It follows the same concept I have been facinated with lately, The Law of Attraction. So many of the passages are so uplifting and inspiring that I want to capture them in my mind and read them when I find myself resorting to negative thoughts. Here is just one example.

From---"Thoughts Become Things" By Mike Dooley 2009

It's Me! Life!

Thoughts are the things that draw life to you
Like a magnet to steel
they're how dreams come true,
It's really that easy
and a whole lot of fun.
just know what you want
and imagine it done.

Sure, the manifestation part is easy. You already do it, day in and day out. Your dreams have come true. You're living them right now! The heroes and heroines in your life--they're pretty much what you thought you would find right? And the hills and valleys, the challenges and triumphs are just like you pictured them. You've got the right stuff and you are using it! The tricky part, and this isn't always so obvious, is knowing what you really want. Tricky because it requires brutal honesty with yourself. It requires asking questions that ordinarily you wouldn't have to ask, looking at the facts you've made up rethinking what they're provoking, and understanding your fears and your true motivations. No, of course you don't have to go there. Almost no one does. You can fool most of the people most of the time, and no one's going to come tap you on the shoulder to tell you that you have been kidding yourself. Accept the life you lead. Question yourself and think deep.

Running, Stage 1

2010-09-03T16:51:00.000-07:00

Running. Oh how I Love and Hate it.

But lately that hate is turning far more into love than anything. It's been about a week of me deciding each and every morning that I am going to get my butt up and lace up those running shoes and just DO IT.

I wouldn't call myself an experienced runner yet but, I am at the point where I am starting to enjoy it. I may not enjoy the actual time when I am running but, it is all worth it for that time when I come back, completely wiped out, sweat trickling down my brow and the surge of seratonin running through my veins!

My runs usually consist of the trails along Autzen Stadium. It's just across the street and I can head right out my front door and head that way. It's also pretty populated during the day so I never feel scared or uncomfortable out there. I see a lot of people running while I am out which helps motivate me too. One day I hope to run a marathon. Right now I have to focus on even completing a mile without stopping but, it's certainly a start! My legs are aching today but, it's such a good feeling. I am lucky because I have a great pair of running shoes and plenty of workout gear courtesy of someone very special in my life so I didn't need to buy anything to get started.

When I read articles in "Runners" magazine I am so amazed at people who get up at 5am and go running for 10-15 miles! That is crazy to me but, who knows one day I might be one of those people. I can see already how it can be addicting and it tones up your entire body.! Cheers to Running !

Happy for No Reason

2010-09-02T19:02:00.000-07:00

Why is today different than any other day? Well it is not. I still woke up as usual, went through my normal routine and nothing in particular happened out of the ordinary.

I went for a long run near Autzen Stadium and marveled at how beautiful a day it was. Several folks were out and about getting the tailgaiting area ready for Saturday's Big Duck game and I ran past enjoying the views and trying very hard to focus on my breathing which was getting shallower as I went along. I am not yet what I would call a "runner" but, I am going to get there if it kills me. I will do it and I know I can do it.

So back to what was different today. Nothing a normal person would notice but, something was. Something huge.

I chose to be happy for no reason at all.

That statement may not seem like anything much but, oh it is. Ever since meeting inspirational life coach Maria Lesetz and reading more and more about the Law of Attraction, I am becoming more in tune with my thoughts every single day. Let me tell you it's far harder than you would think. I have so many negative thoughts in one day that need to be changed and re-purposed but, I think I am making progress...

Case in point, something happened this morning which normally would have made me very upset. I don't need to get into the actual event but, it was something that gnawed away at me for a bit turning into a bigger and bigger demon that became too frustrating and depressing for me to control. The old thought process would have ruined my day but, I chose to take a deep breath and decide that I can only control my own emotions. I cannot control someone else's. I also cannot make a person act a certain way or hope that they will respond in a way that I would want. What I can do is focus on what is good and focus on my goals and dreams and things I appreciate in life. Life throws some bad bad things your way sometimes but, if we can learn to change our thinking about them think about how much more fulfilling life will be?

As I say this I recognize that it is very very hard and I have a ways to go. I am only at the tip of the iceberg with it but, I know that eventually I can control my life by controlling my thoughts. Then again nothing that challenging has happened to me since I came across this concept..I suppose that would be the true test to see if I can implement changing my thought patterns. But, I am excited to see where this leads :)

Attacked By Acid and Still So Strong

2010-09-02T17:38:00.001-07:00

I am always amazed by acts of courage. By people who stay strong when life throws them in the worst possible situations. Such as this woman:

PORTLAND, Ore. — Bethany Storro had just bought a pair of sunglasses and was celebrating a new job when a woman walked up to her with a cup and said: "Hey pretty girl, do you want to drink this?"

The woman then splashed acid in the cup on Storro, who stumbled in pain and fell to the ground screaming. She felt agonizing pain as the skin on her face bubbled and sizzled and portions of her blouse disintegrated.

"It was the most painful thing ever," Storro, 28, said Thursday. "My heart stopped. It ripped through my clothing the instant it touched my shirt; I could feel it burning through my second layer of skin."

Police are seeking the woman in the Monday attack as Storro, with her head wrapped in white bandages, recounted Thursday how only days before, she had been celebrating a new job and a recent move to Vancouver, Wash., from Idaho.

But she insisted that she would not let the attack in Vancouver wreck her life, and laughingly marveled how her eyesight was spared just minutes after she bought those sunglasses.

Storro said she had spinal meningitis twice as a child, which robbed her of most of her hearing.

"Oh my gosh, to be hard of hearing and blind? That would drive them nuts," she said, laughing and pointing at her parents, Joe and Nancy Neuwelt. "They have to be in the same room for me to hear them. I'm just so glad it's a miracle."

Though her face may be scarred forever she is keeping up a positive attitude and trying her best to stay strong. What makes one person be so optomistic when another would simply give up? I admire her courage and her determination that this attack will not ruin her life. I also wonder how low a person can go to feel that they need to disfigure another. In a way it's worse than any other attack. You can stab someone and they can recover...or you can hit someone and they will recover..but, when you throw acid on someone is comes from such a deep level of hate that it's downright scary. One woman is in the depths of her dispair so much that she needs to maim another while the woman she maims ends up having hope and positivity in her heart.